Think of this as the season finale on my new cat adventure.
“Necessity is the mother of invention.”
Quick background: I went to the local animal shelter to donate towels and came home with a one-eyed cat. She was younger than I thought. After introducing to my other three cats I found out she had one-celled thingies in her digestive tract. All the cats had to be pilled 3 times a day for a week. So starts the saga….
The meds — oh yes, different pills for different sized cats.
Bringing a new cat home to an existing brood is always stressful. I am not sure if it was more stressful to the cats or to me. I am a worrywart so it was me. My two lady cats took to her right away. Yes, there was hissing but very little.
My drama queen guy cat was the king of hissy fits. He actually hit me on the head and said, “What were you thinking?” Seriously!
Day 1 and 2 were uneventful as I kept her isolated to get the feel and smell of the house.
Day 3: Jake, who is a tall, long cat overshot the litter box and peed all over the bathroom where I had set up a spare box. We had a conversation. He said his equipment is too big for the small litter box. (Believe me it’s not small — the box that is. Not sure about the equipment as I am not an expert in feline genitalia.) He said he couldn’t help it if he was well endowed. I just rolled my eyes. There is an acre of litter boxes elsewhere that he could have used. I had to clean the bathroom.
Day 4: Initial medication is liquid, $120. No one likes it and everyone spit, foamed at the mouth and sprayed it all over. Called vet for a different form. I got pills. The vet took pity and charged me $20. I had to completely clean the kitchen.
Day 5: The pilling starts. One cat won’t take pills so I crush it in food and wait all day for her to eat it. One cat takes them in pill pockets. Jake is cranky but takes them normally. The little one ate the pill pockets. All this took most of the day. Pilling cats is a full-time job.
Day 6: The crushed food cat won’t eat the food with the pill (so she didn’t get her dose) but the pill pocket cats still take it that way. Jake a.k.a. Crankypants is even more cranky.
Day 7: The pill pocket cats have learned how to eat the pill pocket and spit out the pill. I have another discussion with the vet tech. I plead with her to move in for a week only to hear roaring laughter. She says I need to toughen up and quit the “coochy-coochy stuff.” I am pissed (that’s a technical term) but not at her. How can such little critters get me so flummoxed. Each cat gets put on the washer and they either get my finger in their mouth or a syringe-like pill plunger. Only one pill goes in back of the washer, ok maybe two. Jake is beyond cranky. He is considering going to court for emancipation.
Day 8: I am businesslike and quick. All cats are pilled in under an hour. I find one pill crushed on the bottom of my shoe. I consider it all a success. Jake loses emancipation case as he cannot inject himself with insulin. Judge dismisses.
Day 9: I am cutting the time down to 30 minutes now. I am on a roll but I did have one clawing incident that drew blood. Battle wounds. I am expecting a purple heart for this. Chocolate helps heal.
Day 10, 11, 12 and 13: No big deal. Done in less than 10 minutes. In fact I am considering starting a business, Cat Piller for Hire…or maybe Have Pill Plunger Will Travel.
Thanks to all the readers who gave pilling advice and sympathy! Thanks to my cats who did not spend the week under the bed which was a miracle.
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This was funny though I take pity on you but I’ve heard about this drill with my cat friend Carol who seems to always be pilling one of her brood.
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That event made me a much better piller. Cats can smell anxiety on you. At least on me. It must smell like kibble! 🙂
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I wish you lived closer so that you could pill my cats. However, even you could not pill Pear Blossom. Pear will swallow a pill if forced and then throw it up immediately with a look of HAHA, I WON even if she’s losing because she won’t get well. So I have to pay compounding pharmacy prices for liquids sometimes.
The parasite stuff is the worst with cats.
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New cat Gracie was unable to be pilled even by the vet tech. Turns out that she had bad teeth that had to be pulled. The vet couldn’t look in her mouth but we felt there was something definitely wrong so I took her in for dental surgery not sure what they’d find. Now she’s a different cat. She must have been in pain.
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That’s exactly what was going on with Sloopy Anne, although now she still doesn’t like people around her mouth. I’m so glad it worked out well for Gracie!!!
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I. cannot. stop. laughing. at your description. Holy cow, that an ordeal. Glad everyone made it through semi-intact. 🙂
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None of that was exaggerated. That’s the sad part. I swear the cats were having meetings on how to avoid pills.
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I know which is why I couldn’t stop laughing. I know, I’m a terrible person, but I couldn’t help it. I could actually ‘see’ the cats spitting out their pills. 😉
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Thanks for the wonderful morning laugh. Oh how I remember my first attempts at all of this. I had never had a cat and ended up working at a cat shelter. I was there on my own. I had over 100 cats to pill. A few war wounds and many days spent like yours, I became proficient, like yourself. I’m sure you could start a roaring business selling out your skills now. How are they all feeling? Hope you don’t have to keep this up for too long. Also so pleased to hear how well the new little one is fitting in.
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HA HA HA HA!!! This is hysterical! Thanks for the giggles! Love you guys!
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Cat Piller or Pill Plunger – both would sound awesome on a resume.
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That’s what I was going for…awesome!
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You loved minute of it. Don’t deny it.
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Go Kate! It’s like you survived war
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Quite a while ago I had one cat sick with something I can’t even remember, but the vet told me over the phone to feed the cat white rice. A while later I called back to ask how you get a cat to eat white rice.
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There is something worse than pills!
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I feel a CEO title coming on.
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Yep, with no salary!
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Hahahaha!
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Cat piller for hire! I like the sound of that. I have never understood how it is they absolutely anticipate and know what is being hidden in food and can resist better than most children! You are so dedicated and loving. It’s a wonderful thing to witness. Everyone doesn’t care for their pets with this much devotion. 🙂
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Through their hunting skills they can sense things like tension (which I always have when I have to pill them) and they also know when the routine is changed. They remember things too, like the pet carrier takes them places they don’t like.
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You are a rock! And I mean that in all the BEST WAYS!
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Oh Kate…I had no idea!!!! How long must this go on? I am quite lucky…one comes running when he hears the pill bottle shake! He thinks it’s a treat. The other one is so docile that he just gives in. But, I so understand your frustration. Hope all is well now.
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All done now.
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No more pets for me. Beyond the sadness of loss the vets get three times what my cardiologist gets.
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You don’t need pets. You have wonderful grandchildren. The best part about grandkids is that you can send them home when they need pills.
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You are to be commended for your persistence, your versatility, and your generous, loving heart.
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It took a lot of chocolate. I actually had 2 Starbucks mocha lattes on at least 2 of the days.
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I have never heard of a pill plunger! How does that work? It sounds like something I need!!!
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They look like syringes (it’s in the foreground of my drug photo). You put the pill in one end and insert it into the cat’s mouth in back of the canine teeth and push. The key is always to get the pill back far enough so they can’t spit it out. I got it at my vet’s office but they may have them at pet stores too.
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I’ll come see you when the time comes that I have to medicate my beasts.
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And you still have all your fingers – success! Hope the pilling is all competed.
(It is a character building experience…but for whom, they never say)
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Quite frankly, I have more character than I need.
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and a couple of furry characters….
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I am dumbstruck at your devotion and tenacity Kate! May they all be cured of the of the “one-celled thingies” that are plaguing all your lives.
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You would do it for Roxy!
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I can only step back in awe and wonder. I would have had a nervous breakdown by now. Woman, hear you roar!
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What makes you think I didn’t have a breakdown? Would any normal person do this? Oh yes, cat lovers would but that’s not saying they’re normal.
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Cat lovers are normal…it’s the other people who are not normal. You should know this.
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Oh this is so funny, I do feel sorry for what you went through but the visual you expressed is a hoot!
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I hope all your “catty” troubles are over for good!!!
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Me too! It’s exhausting.
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I think you have the makings of a reality show there 🙂
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I wonder if there is any money in it. You can be sure as soon as the cameras come in the cats will remain under the bed. That would make a boring series.
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True enough. Although one of mine is fearless and nosy. He never hides. Not even from the vacuum.
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