Mollie here. This week the human put me in the portal to hell. I hollered loudly but it did no good. I was whisked to the V-E-T where they did horrible things to me. Seriously, personal space people! It was inappropriate. I’ll need therapy for that.
The human was upset. I stopped eating wet cat food. I haven’t eaten any for almost a week. Not a problem for me. I have the crunchy stuff which I like better. It was her stupid idea to eat wet after my last dental procedure. Bleah!
She got all weepy on the ride over. I could tell she was worried. She said that the last time she took Hazel to the vet, she came home without a cat. I tried to assure her that I didn’t intend to leave my kingdom just yet. We have that young’un who isn’t completely trained. She’s a little slow on the “pick-up” and needed some “what for.”
They took blood and weighed me. My weight was up and everyone knew that I had been sneaking the dry stuff when no one was looking. I just fluffed my tail and flapped my adorable eyes. What ev!
When we got to the car my human said to me, “You were so good Mollie! No yelling or resisting. No one got hurt! You are a wonderful cat.”
I realized she was coming off of her blubbery spell so I said, “You were good too Mama. Let’s get you a Starbucks!”
And so it happened. We pulled into the drive-through singing an old Eagles tune. “Well, I’m running down the road trying to loosen my load….” (Imagine that in meow language with the worst human singer ever!)
The blood work is fine. The portal from hell is safely back in the closet and I’ll eat what I damn well please. End of story.
Mollie
Pingback: Sassy cats – Mollie, part 2 | Views and Mews by Coffee Kat
Laughed out loud at the Portal to Hell headline. Good golly Mizz Mollie. She made it through, and so did you! Yay Hoomans!
MJ
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So far so good. She’s getting old though.
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Poor Mollie. Poor you. Glad everyone is ok.
“Portal to hell” … hahahahaha!! So true 😆
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Yep, you go in there and get pulled out at the vet’s.
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hehehe! … and I thought it was just Theo who had to be pulled out at the vet’s office 😆
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Pulled out, yes. They go back in all by themselves. Sometimes it’s so fast you can’t believe they are back in the carrier they hate so much.
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We will eat almost anything We can get (mol).
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LOL!
So glad you are OK, Mollie, and thanks for taking it easy on your human. She loves you and worries about you 🙂 And glad you are back to enjoying your crunch food!
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So hard to get the peeps to listen to me. I know best! — Mollie
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What a great outcome! And Mollie tells a wonderful story. She has great insight into the relationship between a cat and her human. 🙂
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Yes she knows how to manipulate, like all cats!
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😂😂😂😂Such a good story from Mollie. Watch out. She may give you a run for your money in the blogging world…Elle
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She is the alpha cat of everyone here.
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Yeah, health food, bleck! Junk food always tastes better. My human gives us health food too. We only get the good dry stuff as a treat or dessert. Sucks.
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Hmmm…Maybe a tuna treat would be welcome today!
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I like the way you think!
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I totally sympathize with the cats not eating issue.
I’ve been very ineffectively trying to convert my dry food eaters to wet.
I foolishly thought I would step directly into the ones with the highest animal protein. It’s very expensive. It assumed, like an idiot, they would love it. Not so much. Many dollars have been thrown in the garbage.
So now we are going the route of transitioning with fancy feast wet. Some flavors are favored, and some are not. Some favored flavors are occasionally disdained for reasons my puny human brain cannot comprehend.
A couple of weeks ago it appeared to me that they weren’t eating either the wet or the dry. I was starting to panic. But then they settled into a routine in which they dictate all aspects of the food they consume and I’m merely the inadequate wait staff and financier. This is an expensive transition. I’m fairly sure I’m spending more on their food than mine.
Sigh.
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I relate to this. When we adopted Gracie she had crystals in her urine. Vet wanted her to get more water and switch to wet. Tell a cat she has to drink more water. Not going to happen. We went on a ride with all sorts of flavors, brands, etc of wet. Toppers, supplements. We tried it all. Some no one ate. Others everyone but her ate. For a while she only ate cooked chicken. Then she settled on FF grilled chicken. No feast or other flavors, only grilled chicken. Fortunately my other cats will eat that too. Still not sure what’s going on with Mollie (still not eating right) and I’m not convinced it’s over.
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I wish they could talk. It would so much less stressful.
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Yes, all the way around!
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I’m so happy that all is well. Why Mollie prefers dry crunchy stuff to the yummy wet stuff, I just don’t understand.
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You can never understand cats. They just are.
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Well Mollie was kickin’ and screamin’ and whinin’ about the indignity of it all, but look what a sweetie she was in the end. Her Mama was sweet talkin’ her and she gets her way anyway. 🙂
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The cats always get their way.
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Tuna juice. Mollie knew it was available but not offered. How rude and dramatics called for. Next? Did anyone say grilled salmon chunked and hand fed?
Mollie use your words – Mom was wooooorrried. ( and no one likes the portal to hell)
No one injured – that deserves a thumbnail size of vanilla ice cream for sure.
Pawsome calm rest for both Mollie and Mom ( and that young un does need a bit of direction, so sweep in there, Mollie.)
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🙂
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Those humans, they get blubbery over their four-legged family and sneer at other humans. Yeah, we four-leggeds are much easier to get along with, says Max.
Cute and funny. Glad Mollie is okay. Have a great weekend.
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Vet trips are hard on everyone!
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You certainly showed them, Mollie!
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She did!
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OH Mollie, the indignities we put up with in the name of good health… I also prefer crunch over wet. Be patient with Mom, she’s just worried. Good day your royal highness! lol
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Crunch is best!
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Glad to hear all is well Mollie. Your Mom worries about you (she’s allowed, goes with the territory)
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She was much better when we got her a mocha latte!
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A-ha! Maggie likes latte coffee!
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Poor you, Mollie. I’m glad you are safely back home. Give your peep some extra lovin’ for taking good care of you, even if you didn’t like it.
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I’ve forgiven her. — Mollie
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We all have PTSD about the vet’s office – the cats for one reason, humans for another.
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That is the truth!
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I’m glad Mollie is okay. Great story!
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She checked out ok. I’d feel better if she’d eat like she did 3 weeks ago. I’ll keep tabs on her weight to make sure she’s eating the dry.
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LMAO. Cats! So sneaky it’s hard to tell what’s really going on.
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She’s really slowing down so it worries me. Vet suggested a poop test but she doesn’t go out (nor do any of the others) so I don’t know where she’d pick up something. Just another $$ for nothing definite.
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I love animal stories with happy endings. Wonderful.
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So far it’s happy!
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I love this post — funny and very touching at the same time. I’m glad that all is well for Mollie!
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Me too! She is a trooper!
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LOL HAHAHA! Sorry to laugh Mollie but your perspectives on life bring me to giggles – especially re the human”s emotions going and reurning.
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The peep is a basketcase. A very soft touch for animals! –Mollie
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I don’t blame you for not eating the wet stuff, Mollie…yuck! I enjoy a good crunch, too. Glad to hear you’re okay.
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You get me!
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I hope your gut instinct is wrong and Mollie just changed her mind on the wet food. Who knows the manufacturer could’ve changed something little and she can tell. Tyler is down to one wet food he’ll eat unless I sprinkle the freeze-dried chicken on the offending flavor he used to like. Vets can only check/see so much. Trinity got a clean bill of health at just 9 years for a routine yearly appointment and passed 5 days later completely unexpectedly. Don’t you wish they could just tell us what’s up?
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Same thing happened with Hazel. She had a physical and one month later she was gone from a massive abdominal tumor and congestive heart disease. How does that happen? That’s a lot of why I’m a little crazy this round. Mollie is older than Hazel was. I’m going to see if I can get her to eat something else or maybe tuna juice. Yes, I wish they could signal to us what’s going on.
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Bwahahaha! You sure can spin a hilarious “tail” pretty girl. Glad you managed to get a good v-e-t report. Moms are masters at looking ridiculous in front of their fur-babies. Guess that’s why we love ’em.💖
Your fur-iends,
Sam & Elsa 🐾
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Yes! We have no shame and will do anything to soothe them.
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Ha! Oh my goodness I do like how your cats think. Portal to Hell, indeed. But in the end you both got to take it easy…
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While driving down the road….(no way I’m running with the portal to hell)
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I have a cat who absolutely will NOT eat wet food…..somewhere in the middle is the ideal and most cooperative cat but he’s not my Teddy. Glad Mollie’s blood work, exam went well though. I think some cats DO change eating habits with age – I know my Sammy changed a LOT through the years with eating habits….I think these periods in the lives of our kitties are how they got that “persnickety” reputation!
Hugs, Pam
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Still worried though. Since the behavior change was abrupt and new, there wasn’t enough time to lose weight. I will monitor that to be sure. Mollie was adopted as an adult after she had kittens. She wouldn’t eat wet then. Over the years I was able to get her to eat a tablespoon to supplement the dry. Last year she had a massive dental procedure losing several teeth. Afterward she moved to wet and stayed there (with occasional kibble) until 2 weeks ago. Not sure what the impetus was for the change but I’m keeping my eye on her. She’s going on 16 so any change makes me nervous. At least I know it’s not of the “biggies.”
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That positive talk out loud and singing an Eagles tune out LOUD is good! Also good that you got Mollie checked out which you already know. Mollie, you were very smart and thoughtful to suggest a Starbucks for Mama… Now you can get back to the work of getting Sasha trained for the life of a Sassy Cat. Glad Mollie checked out okay♥
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She’s a great cat. Always has been although back in the car getting her into a carrier was a lot of work. Better carriers these days and less resistance on her part.
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Glad All is well with Mollie, and that was so nice of her to suggest a Starbucks. 😉
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She knows how to keep me happy!
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In the words of a famous black cat…”relax cupcake…she is fine” So glad the check up went well. And you did say she has gained weight. You know how finicky cats can be..perhaps try different flavors of wet food.
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She continues to not eat wet. I’ll keep track of her weight because I’m not feeling good about it all. It just happened one day. She woke up and said, “Wet no more!” Argh!
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Glad Mollie is ok.
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I’m still not convinced. Something has changed and maybe it’s just a part of natural aging.
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Take it Easy
Take it Easy
Don’t let the sound of your own wheels drive you crazy
Glad that Mollie and her keeper got some good news!
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And we got to sing too!
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What a scare! Glad that Mollie is okay, but a good idea to have her checked out. Coffee! Lots of coffee in your future! Be well. Breathe. L.
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It’s hard to see our pets age.
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we love stories what end with a starbucks and not with star wars!!! yey for getting good results and for being such a trooper!!!
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Me too. Still wish she would eat more.
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