It’s me! I survived the horror of horrors — surgery!

The peep (the one I trust) woke me up one day at dark o’clock and stuffed me in the portal to hell. It was before the birds were up. No breakfast. In return I sang Carmen all the way to the V-E-T.

Once we got there, she turned me over to strangers! Yikes! They took me to the back room where bad things happen. There was a lot of nonconsensual touching. They stole the fur from my paw to insert a needle. After a while the room was floating and life seemed good. They shaved my neck, but I didn’t notice it at the time.

Sasha: This is me moments before I was scooped up and stuffed in the portal to hell. See how peaceful I am! the peep brightened the picture but it was darker outside.

I fell asleep and dreamed of catnip toys, Gus and sunbeams. When I woke up, I didn’t feel so good. Still no breakfast and there were other whiny pets in the back waiting for their turn in the chamber of torture. The peep picked me up later in the day. I rewarded her with a softer version Ozzy Osbourne’s “I’m Coming Home.”

The vet said to give me a small meal. That’s a bunch of bunk. I screamed until I got my full dinner and then some. The peep said if I barf it up, it was my own fault. I didn’t. I was on the verge of starvation. You could feel my ribs! I was going on 20 hours since my last meal.

I slept a lot the first few days. The peep gave me pills. Gus washed my head. He said I smelled funny and he was working on getting it back to normal.

This is not a boa! Someone must explain that to the peep.

My neck was cold. I needed a boa. I ordered one on Amazon, but it hasn’t come yet. The peep put a wrap on it so I wouldn’t scratch it. I still prefer a boa with lots of fluff and wild colors. I have a neck scar which should give me street cred. The peep said it took 3 months for Gus’s fur to grow back when he had surgery. I really need that boa. NOW! (What if my agent need photo shots taken?)

The peep bought me a new kicky stick for being so good. I slobbered it up. It was wonderful. I had to go back to get the stitches out but at least I had breakfast first. All I have left are a few tiny scabs. Everything is healed up and looks good.

Now this is a boa! Courtesy of Amazon

Life is good again and that dang portal to hell is stored back in the closet.

Author’s note: Sasha had a mass removed from her neck. The results came back. They took it all out and it was benign. All good.