
My brother and Gracie taking a nap. He was released from the hospital but my sister-in-law is still in.
The background – If you haven’t been following, my brother and his wife were in a horrific auto crash over a week ago. You can read about it here.
When the brain’s not clicking – With the recent upheaval in our family life, I find my concentration is affected. The words either don’t come or are dark. My neurotic self feels out of control and I have to work on acceptance. Some days I have to work harder than others. Many days require two mocha lattes. Starbucks is the winner here.
Who you gonna call? – No not ghost-busters but family. And friends. I have been amazed at how many friends have come forward to provide comfort. Thank you!
Hospital rooms – My clothes closet is bigger than a hospital room. It’s hard for two people to pass. We have advised anyone visiting to not take in anything. No room for flowers or balloons. Even candy doesn’t work as the diet is limited and it’s another thing sitting around. However, I don’t want to go as far as saying not to bring it because we have been taking the candy home for “later.” Ok, I admit I filched one piece. It was a box of mixed chocolates and I almost got something I didn’t like. Stealing one piece may be OK but taking multiple bites and putting it back probably isn’t.
There are always funny stories – Every devastating event has a few funny stories. You have to look for them because they hide behind the pain. One of my favorites is that the first time I saw my sister-in-law a few hours after the crash, her eyes were all purple but her face wasn’t bruised. I asked the doc if there was any injury to her eyes. He laughed and said they were concerned too but it was eye shadow.
That’s it for me today. How was your week?
I’m very sorry to read about the car accident. Kate. What a schock! Thinking of you all, wishing you the very best and a speedy recovery for your SIL. ❤
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Thanks.
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It’s good that you’re close enough to be able to help him. I hope your sister-in-law is doing better. – Marty
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Progress but slow.
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Your family’s situation and the occurrence of such a devastating accident is upsetting to each of you, and I hope you’re not being at all hard on yourself for feeling “unmoored.” What you’re describing in loss of attention and feeling unsettled is the response to trauma. I think whatever mocha lattes can do for you–great! The more the better. I just hope your sister-in-law is recovering. I’m sure very, very slowly, but we’re pulling for her! And all of you!
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Thanks. Having friends reach out has been very helpful. For some reason I find mochas soothing. Maybe it’s the routine of it. The folks at SB know me and make me feel good even if it’s just for the moment. The chocolate is so good but not as sweet as a dessert would be.
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Glad there’s a cat on guard – can’t have injured guests moving around too much. Cat healing beats a whole lot of other medicine.
The eyeshadow is hilarious
Those who can find something to smile at during the worst times, are the ones who are best equipped to get through life’s ups and downs
Hang in there (and I hope this comment will stick – I’ve tried 3 times with the last post)
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It stuck! There have been more funny stories that I will share. Gracie has been his therapy cat. Today he is going home to his own place. I will miss him. SIL is still in the rehab place and will be for another maybe 2 weeks or so.
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It’s good your brother is at home with you – being with family helps make him heal faster emotionally. It would be awful for him to be alone right now – too much time on his hands to think and worry. A nice kitty in your lap doesn’t hurt any either. 🙂 The eyeshadow story is funny – humor helps doesn’t it?
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He is going to his own home today. He says he’s ready and we’ll try it. He’s always welcome back if he’s not.
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Well that’s good – he’s making progress. Hopefully your sister-in-law is making progress as well.
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She is. It’s just slow.
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That’s good – must be very frustrating for all of you. Stay strong.
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I think it is very interesting how Gracie is keeping an eye on your brother. Cats know… I really believe that. The eyeshadow is a giggle. I don’t wear eyeshadow but you won’t catch me without bare mineral makeup and earrings… I get her. I am so happy to hear she was transferred to rehab. I remember her recovering from a bad break. I know she is going to do what it takes to come back from this.I love how you all are there for one another.You all have my continuing prayers.
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Thanks. My brother is doing amazingly well. He was more fit than my SIL before the accident.
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Kate, when my husband had his accident (the broken feet story), I could not think clearly. I forgot the simplest of things, and I worried something was wrong with me. It all straightened out over time. I say this because I understand how the brain might not be clicking right now. An unexpected, tragic event and upheaval in the household can do that temporarily.
So glad you can still find humor. I’ve said some prayers for your family. Take care.
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I know exactly what you mean. Oddly enough, I am the person remembering stuff (I use lists for everything). When I’m the patient I make my husband come along because I can’t remember anything.
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The eye shadow story is great. Lousy situation but good story. Hope your mocha lattes are keeping you fueled for the week to come. It’s gotta be a better one, right?
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The lady goes no where without her makeup! It’s another generation.
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LOL about the eye shadow! Humor is something that is always helpful!!
Glad that your sister in law is getting better day by day. You go ahead and treat yourself to Starbucks, you need it! I am sure your brother and SIL are so grateful for you, just remember to take care of yourself as you take care of them! ❤
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As they get better that will take care of me.
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Hang in there, Kate, and get as much rest as you can. You are such a blessing to many people.
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I’m not sure about that. I am not a born care taker but I’m pushing through and some of it is instinctive.
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I’m so sorry about the car accident. With all the driving we all do, and the speed, and the bad roads and weather, sometimes I wonder how we make it home safely as often as we do. Best wishes to your brother and sister-in-law in their recovery. Thank goodness for chocolates, Starbucks, and humor.
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For some reason chocolate and coffee together is very soothing to me.
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You are right, Kate — family and friends are everything. Wishing your brother and sister-in-law a speedy recovery!
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They were very active in their church and other local groups. Managing and keeping people informed is a job!
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You are so right – family and friends are everything. Wishing your brother and sister-in-law a speedy recovery!
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Sorry to hear about this tragedy in your family. The support of family and friends is sometimes as good as medicine. By all means, look for the humor. It is always there if you look hard enough.
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Support is very important to recovery. I feel so sorry for those who do not have it.
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Thanks for the update. Humor helps even in a hospital room!
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It’s a kind of crazy family so there are always stories.
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Thanks for updating us, Kate. Still thinking of you. Loved the story of the eye shadow!
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My SIL doesn’t go anywhere without eye shadow!
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So glad SIL is making progress enough to be moved to a rehab facility! And great that your brother has you guys and Gracie to help him out! Cats really do know when we need them, don’t they? And love the eyeshadow story!
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Thanks for encouragement. Cats do know when to pull through.
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You have to try and find humor during times like these. Its good to see your brother doing better. Do they know how long your SIL will be in? It’s not unusual for something like this to upset not only your life, but your emotional equilibrium as well. Stay well, Kate.
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It’s emotionally draining. I took a nap today after the visit. Really felt good.
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So good to hear that your SIL is now in a rehab facility. That’s where the healing takes place. And, therapy dogs… lucky her! Therapy cat Gracie seems to be taking good care of your brother.
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She is. If she’s not planted on his lap, she’s napping right next to him. He is her new best friend.
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Good luck to them both in their recovery. This sort of thing really shakes us up!
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Yes I am still recovering and I wasn’t in the accident.
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Thinking of you and your kin Kate. Hope your SIL can come out of hospital shortly.
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She was transferred to a rehab facility yesterday. No machines or IV hookups. Just healing and getting her to walk again.
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It sounds like it’s going to be a long recovery.
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The broken pelvis (hip) may take longer than the ribs. Not sure. I don’t have a lot of experience with this but she has improved a lot in a week. There may be restrictions when she is finally released too.
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Oh Kate, how awful for her. Will they be staying with you for the time being?
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My brother is with me now but he wants to go back to his own home. He will transition back there sometime this week. When she comes out of rehab, he will be home so she will go there. They may have to do modifications for her and have health aides comes in.
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Will they get any help with that Kate? I know in some instances they do over here.
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Maybe. All new territory for me.
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Hope so.
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Your SIL’s doc has a weirdly funny sense of humor. Hope your sister in law is improving. You and your brother definitely look related and I’m glad to see the cats are ministering to his needs.
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We were in to see her today (she’s at a rehab facility now) and they are bringing pets in this week. She said she hoped they wouldn’t jump on her. I explained therapy dogs to her (thanks to you). She will enjoy that even though she’s not really a pet person.
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I hope the visit helps. Sometimes even the most unlikely patient warms up to the visitor. That unconditional love they share is a great motivator towards becoming a fan. 😻
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Your brother and Gracie are looking quite cozy. I hope your SIL is able to be released soon.
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She was transferred to a rehab facility now. Just healing and relearning.
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Which of the two of them was so anti getting a kitty? How is Betty doing at rehab? Hope your evening will “get” you in a happy place! Nothing like laughter to make one feel better.
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Betty didn’t want another pet. She wasn’t raised with animals. They had a cat for about 10 years or so but when that one died she said no more. Happy place here I come.
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Eye shadow! I’m sure she will enjoy that story for many years to come.
Worry always discombobulates the brain. I find a short walk will clear mine up a bit. I know you can walk hospital halls, but I think it’s the fresh air that helps.
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She’s having trouble walking. Must be the broken pelvis and tailbone that gives her walking pain but that’s part of the therapy.
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Oh man .. I realized I was holding my breath while reading this. Time does stop when “something happens,” doesn’t it? And there’s a part of us that looks around, at the rest of the world, with a “how can you go on with your life while all this is happening here?” too. So helpful that your brother has you *and a kitty on his lap* to help in his recovery. And for your sister-in-law, just know that if she didn’t need to still be in, they’d have booted her out long ago. So hopefully she is mending and getting good care and will be able to enjoy the comforts of home real soon. The purple eyeshadow was a moment!
Hugs
MJ
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She was transferred to a rehab facility. We took in her blush and eye shadow. She’s very much a girlie girl and makeup makes her feel pretty!
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My sister used to flip over every chocolate in the Whitman’s Sampler and poke her fingernail in the bottom to see if it was a caramel before she’d eat it. Not that I’m endorsing this method.
Sometimes, you need a dose of humor (or purple eyeshadow!) to get through the day even more than a mocha latte.
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It was very dark purple and very smudged. Betty is more likely to wear blue to match her eyes so I was completely thrown off. I was almost fearful to ask but I needed to know. I’m the caramel in the box girl too passing up the creams. The one I ate was a vanilla cream and it was a bit sweet for me but it was better than some of the “mystery” flavors.
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I hope SIL is well enough to go home soon. Just look at Gracie the therapy cat!
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She was transferred to a rehab facility. Gracie has been amazing. She’s really a diva cat turned comforter.
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Oh my Kate! I missed all of that. Glad your brother is back on his feet and SIL is recuperating. He looks right at home with Gracie on his lap!
Go out, get blog material, laugh a little. You deserve it. ~Elle
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I am good. Just keeping my mind from overdrive. You know how that is.
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Looks like Gracie is helping your brother manage his “anxiety.”
Best wishes to you all.
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She was absorbing any negative thoughts. This was a surprise. She doesn’t sleep on my lap. So jealous!
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We celebrated my wife’s birthday and our 24tyh wedding anniversary, so it was pretty darn good!
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That wounds wonderful. I commend her for surviving 24 years with the craziest bell guy ever!
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If anyone ever deserved a medal…
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This is going to consume your life for a while. Thinking about you and your family, hoping that your SIL is starting to recover. To find humour again is a good start.
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It is. I’m learning to manage my anxiety. My brother is fairly good. Neither of them sustained any brain injuries which is a blessing. My brother will be back in his own home when he feels up to it but SIL will take longer and may require adjustments.
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You’re a good and kind sister 💕
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And he is a good and kind brother.
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I hope you don’t forget to take care of yourself during this challenging time in your life. Prayers continue for you and your loved ones.
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Thanks. I am going to see friends this evening. Their mission is to make me laugh and give me blog material!
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❤
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