Most people live next door to someone. (I don’t personally know anyone that owns an island but I’d make a great friend if you do!)
That someone is a neighbor. They can be good or annoying. They usually alternate between the two.
We are blessed. Our neighbors are good. We rarely see them and they keep their yards neat. No sofas on the front porch or rusted kids’ toys in the yard.
We have some drama but it is first world drama. Our streets are tree-lined and occasionally they die. The home owner is required by the township to replace them but some try to slip by. The ridiculous part is that they own multiple BMW’s but won’t spend $100 on a new tree. It’s not a huge issue. We talk about them behind their backs and all is good.
At my last place I never saw my neighbors at all. On one side there was a huge (15 foot) hedgerow. The other side had 30 to 40 foot side yard as a buffer. However, the people on the buffer side had four kids. They put brightly colored plastic stuff on the property line so they wouldn’t see it from their patio but I had to. Still small stuff.
I had a wonderful neighbor in my past who was retirement age. Her husband was retired. She worked part-time to get away from him. Her stories were hilarious (she was quite the gambler) but not near as delicious as the pie and suppers I would find on my patio table. It’s no fun cooking for two so I obliged by eating.
When I was in my twenties I lived in a neighborhood where the folks periodically got together for a cookout. That was a fun place. I never saw that kind of neighborhood again. Maybe it’s best not to be too close to someone you have to confront when their dog poops on your lawn.
Not all neighbors are wonderful. People have different standards and live at different paces. Even my food bearing neighbor would get annoyed at me if I didn’t keep my leaves raked. I had a full time job and other things to do but I did my best to keep her happy (dogs aren’t the only ones who can be trained with food).
One of my friends has neighbor issues, the nasty kind. She is a kind person but definitely doesn’t “roll with the punches.” She believes in a strict neighbor protocol that is hard to sustain.
Her neighbor on one side has long been an “enemy.” They are at the point where they both do things to annoy the other. Seems like work to me but neither will give or forgive.
Her other neighbor is much younger and very helpful. After a few years of blissful co-existence, she is having conflicts.
She is neither easy going nor forgiving. She is also incredibly sensitive, getting reduced to tears if someone doesn’t live up to her standards.
Perhaps working in a corporate environment taught me some lessons early on. An important one is don’t take anything personal. Many disappointments are due to something the other person is going through that doesn’t involve you.
At a new job I met a guy who instantaneously didn’t like me. (Remember I’m a likeable person!) He was sharp and harsh. I was there for nine months. Two weeks before I left we had a heart to heart. I reminded him of his ex-wife. All his sharp comments weren’t targeted for me. He had a lot of anger and his comments were things that he wished he could say to her. This was a huge lesson because even my boss who saw it couldn’t figure it out. And yes, he was in therapy but it wasn’t working!
Everyone has a bad day. If your feelings get hurt, don’t carry it around forever. Let it go. Let it fly with the wind.
Some people may not like you (and not because of a resemblance to an ex). It has more to do with different personality styles than who is right or wrong. Get over it. There are billions of other people who would make great friends. Some of them may even like you.
If your neighbor has a problem and you can help. Do it. It pays big dividends. It may be in the form of a strawberry pie but I’m good with that!