There are some interesting things about aging. Expiration dates are one of them. It’s not always a bad thing. We have an expiration date when we die but there are others that aren’t as extreme or final.

My butt has one. I can sit for 60, maybe 90 minutes max. No longer or the butt goes numb. You don’t want me to have a numb butt because it makes me cranky. The good part? I never hang around more than 90 minutes. Most things aren’t interesting after 90 minutes anyway.

My feet had one too and they have expired. I can no longer wear those trendy high heels. Boogers.

My car doesn’t have one. I keep most of my cars for eight to ten years. I am not a car person. All good. I can enjoy someone else’s purchase without having to learn new stuff.

Anyone who has read my blog for a while knows that my appliances have an expiration date. Sadly, they have a very short life. Much shorter than my mother’s appliances. Maybe ten years. Fifteen max. I had a costly refrigerator expire in six! Sometimes replacing an appliance (when they are ugly or inconvenient) is okay. Most times it’s like a new roof. I’d rather spend my money on something fun. And cheaper. Like shoes (that I can’t wear anyway).

I have the attention span of a flea. I’m not interested in gossip because what’s the point? Bad stuff happens to people and it seems wrong to rejoice that it’s not you. Ok, once in a while, there will be a juicy morsel that makes my head spin. But it has to be good. I’ve lived long enough that I don’t get surprised very often.

Patience has an expiration date. Sadly, I didn’t get much to start with and my patience expired in 1980.

My prescriptions have expiration dates. I swear I buy them one day and they expire a week later.  Cold medicines are like that. I don’t get another cold until the old medicine expires. Can time fly that fast? Seems like it was just 2007.

Conversation definitely has an expiration. Have you ever talked to someone for what seemed like hours but was really 15 minutes? Yeah, me too. Do the duck and bob routine. Duck out and go to the potty or bar (whatever is appropriate). Or sneak out the back and run like hell to your car! Works every time.

Do you have any things to add that have expiration dates?