Random 5 – Stuff I learned or relearned this week

Gus in the donut collar. This one is too big. Fitting a collar for a cat is tricky business.

I’m no Florence Nightengale! – My cat Gus had serious surgery on his male bits this week. He has pain pills but I’m the one who needs them. Keeping an eye on the surgical site is painful for me. I wouldn’t do well as a trauma doc or nurse — not even as an orderly. I admire people who are caretakers in the truest sense. If it involves blood, stitches, bodily fluids or ugly looking wounds, I’m out. I’ll stick to splinter removal. Even that is “iffy.”

I have more empathy for animals than for most people – Animals are in my “innocents” category. It includes babies, young children and some (but not all) old people. That last category can bring stuff on themselves although sometimes they are truly taken advantage of.

Calm is not my middle name – In the working environment, I was calm. I was the peacemaker. When it comes to my home life, my techniques do not work. The biggest joke is “don’t worry.” I can use that as a mantra, but it doesn’t make it happen. Managing my worry is the best I can do. I expected worry to cease as I aged but nope. It’s still there but about different things. I don’t worry about stupid haircuts or what to wear. It’s more about the “live or die” issues these days. The truth is that worry doesn’t solve anything, but that message doesn’t get from my head to my heart.

Then there is the pity party – When several negative things happen consecutively, I get down. Pity parties are necessary transitions to normal (or as normal as I get) but they must be confined. If something big goes wrong, I allow 24 hours for a pity party, then I need to move on. I’ve stuck to that. Mostly. I may need extra time if it’s a cat issue.

The only way to get to the other side is to walk through it – I’ve always believed you cannot shortcut pain or it will bite you on your butt. Enough said about that.

So how was your week?

Gus Update – Gus had surgery on Wednesday. This morning (Sunday) he had his all important first post-surgical poop. It was beautiful! We celebrated. True to form he did it at the threshold of needing to contact the vet for intervention techniques.

 

 

 

82 thoughts on “Random 5 – Stuff I learned or relearned this week

  1. Poor Gus. Still, with any luck, he’ll be too busy worrying about that silly collar to think about any post-op discomfort he may be suffering. Sending purrs and POTP for a speedy recovery.

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  2. I’m with you when it comes to surgical after-care. I really struggle with any wound care, but I think much of my concern is my concern for the poor animal’s discomfort or pain. I think you’re too hard on yourself, Kate. I think you’re deserving of a very posh pity party! Go for it. No apologies. 😉

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    • I’ve had my moments. Now I’m dealing with a cat who can’t clean themselves yet. The vet said I’m not to get the incision area wet. Poor guy. When that cone comes off, he’s going to give himself a good bath!

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  3. Gus looks silly. I like it but I’m sure he had other opinions about it. I try to remind myself to “worry productively,” which is my lame attempt at spinning “don’t worry” into a more motivating mantra.

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    • I wish I was more successful at it. I’m better with people because I can explain it to them. Animals give you the sad (don’t you love me anymore) eyes. Gus is doing fine though. I will try to introduce to the herd tomorrow but he has to keep the cone on until Tuesday. That freaks them out. The donut didn’t work out so well. It was too big and the next smaller size was too small. I have another one but it has some shortfalls too. Right now I use that one for short term stints but overnight or if I’ll be out of the room for a few hours, it’s back in the clear vet one.

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  4. Boy, I can relate to much of this one. I can’t stand to see an animal suffer. I’m not the best at physical caretaking, although I did okay when my husband’s feet were both shattered. I’m more of an emotional/mental health caretaker. I once had a palm reader take one look at my hand and say, “Oh, you’re a worrier.” Got that right. I do the same with allowing a pity party for a day and then getting on with things. However, there are times I have to walk through pain for a while (like when I grieved my fertility). A friend of mine went on anti-depressants to ward away grief (when her mom died). She’s been on them for a decade now, and it seems like all her emotions have deadened. Not only does she never cry, she doesn’t laugh much anymore either. And she used to be the funniest person I knew. I prefer to face personal grief. I feel there’s much to be learned from emotions and how to use them productively.

    I’m glad to hear Gus’s recovery is on schedule. Sending positive thoughts for a continued smooth and quick recovery.

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    • There have been times when recovery from disappointment or trauma took a long time. The only way to get to the other side is to walk through it. I’d love a pill that would take it away but I’ve never found one that worked so I plow ahead. Yep, I’m a worrier too.

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  5. I’m very glad Gus is recovering. And by the time he’s hanging out with Sasha again, he should smell like himself! Positive reframes are also a good way of walking out of the pity party. Use them all the time myself. The anxiety and stress is no fun whatsoever which is why it’s important for you to take care of you.

    Hugs to you and the kitties.

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    • Since he can’t bathe himself properly, he’s starting to smell catty. Don’t know if Sasha will approve. Every night to go to bed knowing no one will check on him for 8 hours and hope he’ll be ok. So far, so good.

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      • I understand that anxiety! He’s almost a week out from his surgery and each day he’s a little more healed. Could you get some cat wipes, or even a warm damp wash cloth, and help him with his hair?

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        • I’ve wiped his face and legs but he also washes that when I let him out of his cone. They don’t want me touching his booty (the surgery site) and that’s the stinkiest. He doesn’t go back until a week from Thursday. I will ask if they can clean him up. They will be removing a few stitches. Most of his stitches will dissolve.

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  6. I love his expression. He looks like a King. And I beg to differ about your nursing skills Florence. You never left his side once he was back home. You’re so hard on yourself. Loving someone can alter a few things on the spur of the moment. But the upside…well…ya can’t beat it, now can ya. 🙂

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  7. May I suggest bringing confetti to your next pity party. It’s a great way to change things up and the cleanup fills the head with other emotions instead of worry. Besides. confetti is just plain fun. Ask any kid or pet who just shredding a box. Sending gentle thoughts your way. 🎉

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  8. Well, I know just what you mean. Worry is what I do with an occasional intense anxiety tossed in to keep it fresh. I thought as my kids aged, worry would stop, but it never does. I can’t even do splinters. On myself, yes, others, no way. I would be useless in an emergency medical situation!! Everything makes me queasy. Gus is a doll. He’s just keeping you on your toes.

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  9. I really do sympathise; having been in the position of looking after a convalescing cat, Côned for what was supposed to be a few days but ended up a few months, it’s not fun. I hope you are ok? How are his feline siblings helping?

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  10. I endorse your idea about allowing a certain amount of time for a pity party. Sometimes a pity party also requires ice cream. Yesterday, riding back from an outing, my sister and my daughter were talking about what they ate after a big upset. My daughter said she felt better after a chocolate-raspberry blizzard.

    I wouldn’t do well as a trauma nurse either. It’s not the blood so much. It’s the idea of having to cut or jab someone.

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    • I’ve done insulin injections for diabetic cats and tested their blood but that’s as far as I go. I’m definitely a carb girl when it’s comes to food medicating. Pizza ranks right up there.

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  11. If looks could kill, Gus is looking at you while wearing his pink donut, as if to say “please, first it was my bare bum on display for your friends and now it’s this donut!” Glad Gus saved the day and had his poop, eliminating the need to go to the vet. He probably heard you and the beloved husband discussing intervention and freaked!

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  12. Yeah for Gus ( and you, for making it through to this!)
    That doughnut collar is great! Much easier than a cone of shame. The pink is very becoming to the strawberry blonde hair with orange undertones.

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  13. HooRAY! for poop and just in the nick of time! I read in comments you said each day has been better than the last… I always see that as a good sign for sure. It’s great to see Gus with or without the cone/collar. It’s just really good to see his handsome face. Didn’t the donut make an appearance with one of the other Sassy Cats? I am concentrating on sending you good thoughts and hugs, Gus seems to be doing fine!

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    • Both Morgan (broken leg) and Gracie (dental) were given cones to wear. Both lasted one day. Morgan didn’t chew on her bandage at all and I’ve never used one for a dental. Gracie didn’t need it. The pain killers had her sleeping the first 2 days.

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  14. I’m glad Gus is coming along well; celebration this morning! Yayyy! Oh the stress when our fur babies have a problem. His donut collar is cute! I never saw one like that before. I can only imagine what Sasha must be thinking, lol.

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  15. I’m with you on having pity parties but placing strict limits on them. Congrats to Gus on that poop! It’s the little (not so little) things in life that need to be celebrated, right? 😁 Full steam ahead on the recovery train! 🚂

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  16. Good job, Gus! Glad to see him in his donut. Yeah, it’s been a rough week here and it’s been hard to leave the pity party. (It’s like the mob: every time I’m out, they drag me back in.) Your rule is a good one, but darn it’s tough when your are looking at a degenerative illness with only one bad outcome (not me, but a close relative). It’s gonna be a long, painful walk to get through.

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  17. He Pooped! YAY!! The donut collar is a step up from the plastic version because I’m sure it’s more comfy for him but you’d think these companies would produce SIZES for those things. Glad to hear he’s recovering – now if you can also recover – then it will be back to normal (whatever the heck that may be) soon. He actually looks like he’s giving you the “I’m ok Mom” look!

    Hugs, Pam

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