A Mars and Venus thing

Source: Vecteezy

Men are different. Not better or worse, just different.

This past weekend we went to a celebration. It was at lunchtime, but it was a “dress nice” event. We’ve had the date for at least six months.

I mulled over what I would wear and had two outfits in mind. One if it was warm and one if it was cool. I had worn both recently and knew what shoes I would wear. It didn’t require a dry run which I would have done if I wasn’t certain everything would work. There is nothing worse than getting dressed and nothing is fitting or working together. You end up with a bed full of tried-on clothes and a grumpy disposition.

On the day of the event, I changed into my outfit for “cooler weather.” Easy Peasy.

At twenty minutes before we were scheduled to leave, the beloved husband put on dress pants. He hasn’t worn any since before the pandemic (red flag). His weight hasn’t changed but his body shape did. He’s lost some height and his trunk moved down making his waist larger.

First choice did not fit. Second choice didn’t either. We went through all his dress pants (which aren’t all that many) and it was the same story. Now we are close to the time we need to leave. I told him to put on his nicest jeans. We could have stopped at a store on the way but as you get older, these things are less important.

It never occurred to him to do a dry run of what he intended to wear even though he hasn’t dressed up in a few years.

The odd thing is that his jeans are the same size as the non-fitting dress pants but they fit okay. Over the next few weeks, we’ll work on figuring out his new size (maybe with some “give” in the waistband) and acquire a basic pair or two. You can be sure after we do that, there will be no “dress nice” events to attend.

No one noticed his pants and there were a few people in jeans (nicely dressed). The event was fun and really, no one looks at the old people anyway.

It’s hard for me to imagine planning an outing without planning what I would wear. It doesn’t mean a new outfit but it catches any repair you may have to make or (heaven forbid) something that has shrunk in your closet!

I’m blaming it on Mars and Venus!

34 thoughts on “A Mars and Venus thing

  1. It’s been a while since I got “all dolled up” as the expression goes, but I always did a trial run before an event. Whenever I went shopping and got new outfits, I’d come home and try it on with accessories, shoes, etc. that day to ensure I was not scrambling around the first day I wore it. This was because I took the bus for years – it was a tight schedule in the morning.

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  2. So true. Sometimes I think if men are just wearing any kind of pants, they’re golden. Us girls would beg to differ. Good luck finding suitable replacements. I know this stupid high waist trend seems to be creeping into men’s trousers. I recently bought a pair of men’s Levis and noticed even they sat higher on the waistline, er…make that ribcage. Argh.

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  3. OMG, so funny, because it’s so typical. My girlfriend came up with a saying about men that I loved and stole from her. “Why do something once, when you can do it more than once?” Example: My husband thinks I’m ordering him around when he decides to cook something. I’m just trying to explain to him the pitfalls I ran into and no longer do because I learned from them (I’m usually the cook). But he does it his way anyway, hits a pitfall, and has to start all over again (more than once). I think trying on more than one pair of pants qualifies for that saying. 😉

    Thanks for the fun story. Glad you had a nice time.

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  4. You just described my life. I remember pre-planning what I was going to wear to HIS high school reunion. I had two outfit possibilities, both of which required a small purchase to complete the look. He just gathered a few things from his closet and packed the day before we left. Fortunately, his body shape hasn’t changed much over the years, so things still fit. Men are so simple.

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  5. I always have a few outfits in mind before getting dressed, but these days, my “nice” wardrobe is very limited. I had a birthday gala for a political last week and my palazzo pants might have been in style, but my top wasn’t even close. What’s fashionable now? Woven jackets/ blazers with sparkly thread sprinkled throughout. Skirts and knee high black boots. I enjoyed seeing all the fashions, even if I I wasn’t in fashion!

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    • It’s not as fun to go shopping when I don’t have anywhere to wear it. I try to keep a few stuff that would work for funerals and “nice clothes” events. For a wedding, I may go shopping.

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  6. My pants seem to slide down my waist no matter what size and my body shape keeps changing and my weight keeps fluctuating. It’s really a frustrating matter. Good thing I’m retired and don’t go anywhere much and as you say – nobody looks at the old folks anyway.

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  7. I understand. I plan outfits down to the unmentionables while he throws something on with no thought whatsoever. I think that jeans are now considered dressing nice after the Pandemic, but maybe ones that fit are preferred.

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  8. We go through this so often I, too, have had to give up. I will start asking ahead an of an event if he “knows” what he’d like to wear, and that’s my no-longer-subtle way of asking if we can begin a bit of a preview period. I just know we could present ourselves a little better in public if we put in some effort. LOL!

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  9. Before we moved to Florida we could definitely have played out the same scenario, and did. Now for dress nice, it’s what color of shorts, sandals or flip flops for me and for Jerry, mens lululemon shorts and a button up Florida style shirt. Just a tee shirt for Jerry for every day. And you are right nobody pays any attention to old people. That’s a good thing these days!

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  10. Our friends are all “informal” types……jeans – back yard BBQs, picnics, drive to the mountains for a hike together kind of things. We do dress up when we go out to eat (the two of us) because we go infrequently and we decided a while ago that when we DO go out to eat, it will be a really nice restaurant….we have two BIG favorites like that. But nobody we know has cocktail parties or dress up dinners or we’d be out shopping! LOL

    Hugs, Pam

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    • It wasn’t super dress up, just dress nice. I have a lot of clothes I can wear for that. You can dress up black athletic pants with a nice top and jewelry. Sadly the beloved husband only has jeans. He had a few pair of dress pants and a few of chinos all of which do not fit. I was trying to remember the last funeral we went to because that’s when we “dress nice.” Fortunately our friends are like your friends.

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