Hello? Mr. Pulitzer? Kate here.
No you don’t know me. Well, maybe you do. I write this blog. It’s about life, four cats, and stupid people – all the things people aren’t writing about because of the Donald Trump distraction. Maybe the Donald fits in one of those after all.
I know your offspring Lilly Pulitzer. At least I am familiar with her prints. Fun colors!
No? You never heard of my blog? Too bad. There are lots of good reads there. I can send you a link.
Ok, can I have your email address?
Hello? Hello? Mr. Pulitzer, are you there?
This is a dream I had. Just me and Mr. Pulitzer on the phone. (He’s not alive but it doesn’t matter in a dream!)
It made my day. Somehow I felt this personal connection. It was a sign. I had a sense that something good was coming my way. (I had a stomach virus but I was thinking something BETTER!)
Many of you are writers – the kind that get published somewhere other than WordPress. My hats off to you. I started a book four years ago. I changed the entire genre from a business book (boring!) to one similar to my blog with humorous life stories.
I had trouble getting it started. I was able to write a dedication page, then a table of contents. That’s when I got stumped.
I can write 600 words about nothing lickety split but the idea of lots more words that make sense throws me off. (It’s the “make sense” part that’s the problem, not writing them.)
It’s the old “getting started” thing.
Yesterday I submitted some pieces for publication. I heard that no one takes you seriously until you get 600 rejections. I thought I’d better get started on that. I should have accumulated all the rejections by the time I have finished my first chapter. (I may be in the nursing home at that point. That’s far better than at the undertaker!)
It’s not that I procrastinate.
I think. A lot. About nothing. At least nothing that will go into a book.
But yesterday, I finally came up with a plan that I like.
We’ll see if it goes away with my virus. Stay tuned.
I wonder if I can channel Erma Bombeck….
One of the nicest rejection letters I ever got called my work “not quite what we were looking for, but still worthy of capturing someone’s attention”. I practically rushed out to buy a huge frame and put it on the wall. Instead, I think it ended up going through the shredder, which is where much of my writing ends up (or belongs). I actually had someone offer to publish something of mine once, but, wouldn’t you know, I didn’t like what I had written, so I couldn’t say yes. Besides, it felt like standing in the middle of the grocery store in my underwear. Granny panties, quivering with fear. I chickened out. Me and my granny panties went home.
Good for you for submitting something (anything!). Here’s hoping that when the day comes that someone actually extends an invitation (and you know they will, because what you write is a little bit addictive, like good licorice) … well, here’s hoping you have on a fresh pair of undies, and you’re not too scared to show them off. Good luck!
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Not feeling like it’s good enough holds me back sometimes. Since I do humor I wonder if it’s too silly. I can appreciate your reaction. Sometimes you have to give up the granny panties and go for the bikinis (no thongs for me pullease!)
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Rejections are a writer’s box of chocolates. NOT!! But rejections do show that we take our stories seriously enough to put them ‘out there,’ and that’s worth a dark chocolate cherry, right? 🙂 Fun blog!
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With all that talk about chocolate, you are my kind of person!
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🙂
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You can only learn from the rejections… at least that’s what “they” keep telling me… but it’s a daunting thought which in itself stops me from submitting… a vicious circle indeed! I’m not writing anything but have other projects that need to see the light of day… looking forward to hearing how it works out for you.
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and here is to more projects accomplished! Or at least started….
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Yea! Have fun and keep on!
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Thanks!
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Good for you, Kate! If you have an interest in writing, I believe you do have the stories! So keep your sense of humor stoked by not putting too much pressure on the performance aspect of writing, and just make the writing bytes manageably sized and you’ll see it accomplished! Sounds like a worthwhile effort–especially when you’re cooped up inside during the winter! Use that time. 🙂
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We use the “winter” thing to put off a lot of indoor activities. Sometimes it works and sometimes not so much. One of my favorite winter activities is to watch the snow and alternately appreciate the beauty and complain about being cooped up all the while accomplishing nothing. As for the writing it comes in spurts. I on a spurt now! Woo hoo!
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Good for you! I’m impressed that you have a plan and are willing to put yourself out there. 600 rejections? I think I’d curl up in the fetal position after one or two.
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Remember, my expectations are low.
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Exciting news! Erma Bombeck is a good model for you. I saw her a few years ago when she visited Third Place Books in Lake Forest Park near here.
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Are you sure it was her? She died in 1996. Of course that’s a few years ago! I loved her sense of humor!
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Good news, Kate! I am happy you are submitting! I would and do read what you write!
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Thanks!
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All the best Kate! Like they say you won’t know unless you try. I’m am over the moon excited for you Kate!!
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Gotta try!
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Good luck. Because that’s what it takes. I do indeed think that, beyond a certain level of competence, it really is the luck of the draw. On the other hand all you need is one of anything to achieve what you’re after: one job offer to be employed; one proposal to get married; one sperm to make a baby; one acceptance to be a published author. Go for it, and keep going…..
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I’m keeping my expectations low. I am always amazed that people read my stories.
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Aha! So there’s somewhere people can read them? Do tell where!
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At this point just the ones on my blog. (That doesn’t count the ones in my head!)
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I hope you know many literary magazines and journals, both on paper and online, consider anything that has appeared in a blog as “already published” and therefore not for them. The blogger known as JMPod and I once compiled a short list of those known to not mind considering blog material, but I’ve now forgotten which they are. As for the stories in your head, there’s usually quite a distance between head and screen or page, and what leaves the head can change dramatically en route…but those might be the ones to send out, once you’re satisfied with them, before they see WP light of day.
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The places were blog friendly. They didn’t want anything published in a large periodical although small local community magazines and personal blogs were fine. Even Huffington Post is personal blog friendly.
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Great!!!
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I’m good vibes about this attempt, Kate. Published author, dreaming big, why not? :O)
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Perhaps one of those red noses will give me luck.
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The source of my false courage? Never! Red noses are for shallow and small minds— and it only leads to brown nosing. Take it from someone who nose, I mean knows—I’m currently using red dye #8 to cover my nose discoloration. However, you’re above that sort of thing, Kate.
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I read your blog. I am not above anything!
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LOL!!!! 😀
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Ahhh…Erma Bombeck. I do miss humor and wisdom. Good luck with your submission.
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Loved Erma!
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Keep doing what you are doing! It seems to be working. 😎
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Thanks! I am always amazed that it works.
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Kudos for submitting, Kate! As for the book, just take it 600 words at a time. You’ll be done lickety split.
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Great idea. Don’t get overwhelmed by numbers!
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Yay, you! I often think about writing but don’t. Somehow I don’t think of my blogs as “real” writing because I just enjoy writing them and don’t work at it.
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I’m writing because I do enjoy when I get to the writing part. It’s the organization that stymies me.
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Unlocking that maze does seem to be a stumbling block for a lot of folks. The creative part comes naturally, but the organization feels like tedious work. Something that has helped me overcome that hurdle is trying to find ways to make the organization part of the game. Kind of like having to eat your spinach before you get to have the pecan pie. Okay, bad analogy. I actually LOVE spinach, but you get the point. Pretend like the outline or the bullet points are like giving yourself permission to do what you really enjoy … the writing part.
And don’t forget, just because you lay out a framework ahead of time, there’s no rule that says you can’t shove Chapter 7 into the Chapter 1 slot, it it feels organically more comfortable sitting there. And outline is just a starting place. At least for me. Where I begin often has very little to do with where I end up, but at least it does solve one thing … getting me to sit down and write. Good luck!
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My plan is to forego the outline (since I NEVER stick to it anyway) and use topics instead. I made a list of topics. I’ll write about each topic and at the end figure out how to tie them together (or rewrite the whole damn thing!). Thanks for your thoughtful comments.
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Wow. I like your dreams. All I ever dream about is running naked in some parking lot because I forgot to put clothes on for some reason, and my feet are weighted down with lead or something in them. You’re actually conversing with Pulitzer? Well done!
Good luck with this plan… very exciting!
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Running naked? I haven’t had those kinds of dreams in years.
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Now this is really exciting news. Might as well jump in and who knows – you’ll probably be a natural. The hardest part is narrowing down and focusing on one idea. Sounds like you’re on the way. YEA YOU! (and now I’m nervously feeling like I ought to get motivated, maybe, someday…when it’s cooler….)
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After some nice iced tea or maybe a mint julep!
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“You go girl!” And if it’s the stomach virus that gave you all this inspiration, something good really did happen. 🙂
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While it’s unpleasant it can always kick start a diet!
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Good luck, Kate! Hope you don’t have to collect 600 rejections before being taken seriously.
But, then, do you even want to be taken seriously?
Being funny is more fun!
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Seriously? Probably not! Just keeping my expectations low.
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Good for you! Breaking that barrier impresses the heck out of me. I hope you feel good about it, too!
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Yes, let’s hope it lasts and the momentum doesn’t leave for vacation in the Bahamas.
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Good luck and keep going. I could totally see “Imaginary Conversations with Famous People.”
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Thanks! I have jotted that down as a possible grouping.
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Yay for submitting your work, Kate! I believe your dream was a sign. But it could mean you need a Lilly Pulitzer dress.
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Now that’s a thought!
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I wish you the best. Will be cheering from the sidelines. Go Kate!
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Woo hoo! I love cheerleaders!
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Kudos to you for submitting your work, Kate! Keep writing and keep submitting. 🙂
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Thanks! At least I don’t have a deadline!
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