We are anticipating another huge snowstorm to come through Thursday. This isn’t a whiney post about that (although I could do that in a heartbeat!). It’s a series of observations on storm behavior. My apologizes to anyone in warmer climates but this is really a bad winter!
We have had a lot of snow this winter. According to the beloved husband he has cleared 11 snowstorms (correction 17 snowstorms according to him) in the past few weeks and he doesn’t say it with a happy face. He is not excited about the foot he will need to clear tomorrow but maybe that will soften him up for a move to the tropics.
Here are some observations from these snowstorms along with some very sage advice.
Today I picked up some spinach at the market. I know everyone else there was picking up bread, milk and eggs for the French toast but not me. I am looking forward to some Italian wedding soup. I walked over to the spinach section and there was an older couple. They were probably my age but I look so much better that I figured I had to be younger.
They were obviously looking for a special kind of greens. Not sure that they need them because the nicely dressed man was followed by a cloud of….ummm….the foulest smelling fart I’ve experienced in a long time.
I moved quickly to the dips nearby thinking I could wait it out. Really, how long does it take for gas to dissipate? Let me tell you, a long time. Either that or he was having his own Olympic marathon. Put, put, put.
It took me at least 10 minutes and then I just held my breath, scurried in and grabbed a pack of spinach and darted down the aisle.
Fortunately the spinach was in cellophane so it hadn’t wilted from the toxic gas release.
Everyone knows that if you have gas in a grocery store you go to the frozen foods to let her rip. It helps to open a door to let some cold air out. Somehow cold farts are better than warm ones.
What’s with the weather forecasters? I know this is your time to shine but your voice is staccato, you pre-empt all normal programming and there’s nothing new to say. Yep, it’s snowing. We don’t need people sticking yardsticks in the snow on every block. Don’t you have a sun dance?
Walking out the door could kill you. I went out to fill my bird feeders. Looking up, I saw what looked like humongous stalactites hanging from the gutters waiting to fall on my head and kill me.
Now I am always looking upward and I’ve updated my will.
The snow-clean-up guys have done a great job this winter. All of the main roads are cleared and the parking lots of malls and stores are clear too. So where did they go with all that snow? There are snow mountains that you could ski on in corners of parking lots and around light stanchions.
It’s a hazard to drive around them because folks are tired of being slow and careful.
And no post is complete without a note on the Starbucks’ drive-through. When the weather is bad, more people use the drive-through instead of going inside. They also order more food and multiple drinks. This is a conspiracy to make my trip longer. I am longing for the days when folks wander in to order and eat outside under the umbrellas.
Here is the good news. It’s 35 days until spring!