Overzealous courtesy or just plain nuts?

It’s a disease that happens when someone retires. I don’t know how it started. I’m not sure when it started. Just one day it was there.

It doesn’t hurt unless you count your feelings when someone thinks your elevator doesn’t go to the top floor. Or you’re not working with a full deck.

Listen here I was one of the sharpest knives in the drawer…at one time. Could I have dulled? Where is that damn sharpener?

Yesterday I found myself trying to reason with a cat. For goodness sakes! Everyone knows that you can’t reason with a cat. You just tell them. They ignore you and life goes on.

Then I explained to my fish why I couldn’t feed them at that precise minute. Really?

Later in the day I apologized to a chair I walked into. A freaking chair! I didn’t want the chair to think I was rude. I have a good relationship with my furniture and I want to keep it that way.

I always try to explain to my car what the other stupid people are doing in hopes of looking logical…to my car.

That’s it! I care about animals and inanimate objects thinking I’m rude or illogical!

Does it matter what my refrigerator thinks? Nope! I’m annoyed with it right now. The former fridge only lasted six years. Six years! I am holding a grudge against all refrigerators until one hits the 20 year mark.

Not sure how this all started but I fear it ends with me getting institutionalized. We will need to keep this a secret. You are not to tell anyone. Unless you do it?

Humor me while I explain to my keyboard why I haven’t been around today.

35 thoughts on “Overzealous courtesy or just plain nuts?

  1. Hilarious, Kate, and I can relate. I’ve apologized to a store dummy I bumped into, tried rationalizing with my cats about feeding time, and I talk to myself. On the latter, it’s safer that way – no one to disagree with me.

    Get the cashmere straightjackets ready! We can share tea and stories as we count flowers on the wall. 🙂

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  2. ‘Huzzah!’ The rest of us already in the Institution welcome your admissions. Now to the ‘get out of my head’ part:
    Yesterday, I vacuumed the air filter attached to our A/C. When I was done, I caught myself saying (out loud), “there, that’s got to feel better”. The filter agreed. I’m perfectly fine with that. Enjoyed learning I am merely a member of a very large group. No further questions your Honor. Dan

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  3. I am relieved to know it’s not just me! I talk to Frankie all the time. He’s a 13 year old Lab and deaf. Whatever, he completely gets it. In my mind, he has a British accent. Do your cats have accents? Where from?? 🙂

    MJ

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  4. Hahaha! My cat likes to sit tub side while I shower, and the other day – in the middle of a conversation with him – I interrupted myself to say, “hmmm, 30 more years of this, ehh?”

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  5. Uh Oh! I’m in trouble for laughing so hard at you being institutionalized for apologizing to chairs, fish, and cats. I did that for years, but now that I’m really old, I forget and repeat the apologies.

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  6. OMG! Best laugh of the day! Is this what I have to look forward To in retirement??? I fear I may be getting there too soon, You need some human intervention…call me!!!!

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  7. People who work are to busy to be nice to inanimate objects or to care what the cat thinks. Once retired you have time to think about how rude people are to the things in their lives that only want to be respected for their part of making life nicer. You want those important things to know they are appreciated…unless they act up then they are not. The cat…well who doesn’t talk to the cat?

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  8. I named a few of my appliances and my car and my computers. I feel more comfortable talking with them now that we’re on a first name basis. Don’t even think a thing about it anymore. 😉

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  9. I’m in my mid-40’s and I have more conversations with the dogs than I do with the two humans I live with. And that’s usually the most intelligent discussions I have during the day.

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  10. I thought I was the only one who did this crap! Thanks for sharing. I feel better now. Gotta run… my cat is trying to tell me something, and if I don’t ‘hop to’ there will be hell to pay.

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  11. Well now that I snorted soda through my nose…this is hilarious! I have absolutely apologized to a chair for bumping into it, as a pure reflex if nothing else. And I discuss current events with my cats. I yell at the TV a lot. I guess I’ll see you at the institution.

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