Aging out of yet another thing

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Back in the “old days” I loved shopping. I didn’t need to buy anything. Just look at what’s new and perhaps fondle the merchandise! I could try on shoes and imagine where I’d wear them. Swirl around in flowy dresses that would be appropriate for happy hours on the veranda in the islands.  It’s all fun. I always liked fashion. In a different life, I would have pursued that field.

Then I retired. I knew I wouldn’t need much clothing. A collection of everyday comfortable clothes would do. I like to look nice but that’s easy enough. You can buy everyday clothes that look very nice and pulled together.

Twice a year I refresh my tops – sweatshirts and sweaters for the winter and tees for the summer. I’m more likely to wear out tops than bottoms. I had my favorite stores to find unusual designs. (No, I’m not into kitties and teapots embroidered on sweatshirts!)

Then life happened. New generations were born. The kind that don’t like to shop in person. Department stores went the way of the 8-track and cassettes. The few remaining stores catered to younger folks and the elder group that like kitties and teacups on sweats. (Elder is always 20 years older than me!) Boogers.

This week I made my semiannual trek to our “big” mall. Yikes. I didn’t recognize half the stores. I went to my old favs. Everything was moved around and finding things wasn’t intuitive. In one store I found sweatshirts for petite and plus sizes but not regular. It must have been there but after half a day’s allotment of steps I still didn’t find it. There are very few store associates (as they now call them) to help. Long lines at checkout. Merchandise smashed together with no beautiful displays. It doesn’t make me want to shop. It certainly doesn’t entice me to buy!

Before you say buy it on-line, let me tell you about that experience. Unless you go for a specific brand you are flying blind when it comes to clothes. I bought a friend a tee shirt for retirement. Looked nice online. It was a piece of garbage that was embarrassing to gift (but yes I did!).  Sizing is all over the place too. I bought a normal “ladies” size which would have fit a sumo wrestler. A huge sumo wrestler.

So…yesterday’s trip wasn’t too successful. I bought a curtain rod and a Cinnabon (which I didn’t need!). Oh yes, I got all my steps in. Silver linings.

 

63 thoughts on “Aging out of yet another thing”

  2. I agree 100% about the online experience. It can be dicey. I’ve worn a medium shirt my entire adult life. Yet, when I bought some Amazon-branded jersey shirts earlier this summer, they were all huge on me. I ordered again (don’t ask) and this time chose a small. Hm. So I agree: in-person is safer. Plus there are the Cinnabons. 😉 – Marty

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  3. Sounds like you earned that Cinnabon to reward you for all the steps you did at the mall and also for the disappointing shopping session. I hate that the styles are so different these days. I can remember once buying what I thought was a cute skirt suit in a cotton-linen blend. It was made to look like a safari top with a belt, cargo pockets, in a rust color. Wore it to work one day and the material sagged, creased and looked like I had slept in it. For awhile so many clothes were like that – natural fabrics which had zero wearability.

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  5. I’ve never been a big fan of shopping…must have missed that gene. I go looking for what I need and am done. But I admit I mostly shop of LL Bean and Land’s End, except for shoes. Their sizes, for me, are mostly trustworthy, mostly.

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    • I’m a big LL Bean fan. I used to like Lands End but have had sizing issues a few times so I’m leery. Anything that doesn’t fit has be to be send back. We have a local Bean store so that makes it easier.

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  6. I hear you, Kate! I loved shopping at my favorite malls. Don’t like to shop at any malls now and haven’t bought clothes in forever. I have no desire to buy clothes or shoes. Not much into wearing makeup anymore so I just order from bareMinerals online when I need anything which is hardly ever. Makes me sad. I don’t know if it is about aging or just that the covid years took the fun out of shopping. My favorite clothes are fall and winter and I don’t need them here. Maybe need to move back to MO!

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  8. You are 1000% right…..I miss my Mall trips and shopping (and trying on!) for clothes knowing it will be fitting me instead of having to mail something back and hope for the best. So many HUGE things have changed in the last 10-20 years that it’s no longer “friendly” to shop. But it goes so much deeper than that – life is tougher to navigate too. When you age you hope things are easier – well I’m afraid those days are over too! Wish I had a Cinnabon right about now…..no I don’t need it but it would be SOME compensation anyway!

    Hugs, Pam

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  10. Boy do I relate and agree with you, Kate. On every point! Our malls are really dying here in California. Some are closing, and a few have had to get very creative. In Santa Monica a major mall that’s been almost a destination shopping trek has given over a ton of its space to pickle ball of all things. That’s how they’re hoping to attract people. I recently went to one of my favorite “outdoor” malls in a beach city–always been quite upscale and a pleasure to visit, and except for the restaurants I think there were only one or two shops I might have enjoyed. One shop was offering table tennis as a draw to come in! I was never much of a shopper either, but I liked having a few options. Crazy!

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  11. I hate buying clothes online because you can’t tell how thin the fabric is or if it is too stretchy as most things are made now. I used to love Macy’s, but they don’t seem to carry much merchandise in the store now.

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    • I agree with you. Unless I’m familiar with the brand and specific style, I don’t like buying on-line. Sometimes even with brands I know, I’ll be disappointed. A lot of pants are ankle length now. It’s not a good length for me so I have to be careful. Macy’s used to be my favorite but no more.

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  13. There were years when I liked to shop, but these days it’s not a lot of fun as you described. Because there are almost no associates, the items are all over the place and aren’t too appealing thrown in a heap, then add in the sizes that go from one side of the range to the other and none are the same from store to store, I just avoid it as long as I can. There is one store in SC that I shop at during the winter. Two years ago, I found some jeans that I liked and fit. I bought five pairs figuring they’d last til I don’t need them anymore. Jeans ✓. 🙂

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    • I do that with jeans and pants too. I keep one black and navy pant (both are the same brand, style) that I can dress up or down. Then I have jeans and some “activewear” pants (stretchy pull-ups). When I find something I like, I buy a bunch! Lately I’ve been doing that with tops too. If I find a pattern I like, I’ll buy two. Most of the patterned tops look matronly to me and I stay away from solids because of food spots. Somehow food is attracted to my clothes! 🙂

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  15. Years ago I ran two mail order catalogues. I would order things I liked in three sizes, and keep the ones that fitted or suited, but felt no qualms about sending everything back. I agree with you about sizes. I have no idea what size I am in respect of ladies sizes, but do know that medium joggers and extra large tees from the men’s section fit and last!

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  17. As you write so well, shopping is not what it used to be. I don’t go to Malls , except when I promise to take my young teenage granddaughter. We went to the mall to find her a pair of jeans. Each of the stores where she likes to shop played music that gave me a headache and sprayed perfume that made me nauseated. We paid a lot of money for some jeans with holes in them. I hope to never go back.

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    • Me too. Sometimes I put it off. There is one store I like and can usually (but not always) depend on getting a good fit. I will buy on-line there because I can drive to the store to return if it doesn’t work out. Sometimes I’m not even in the mood to shop on-line.

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  20. I never liked to shop (other than at tourist shops, and . . . maybe jewelry 😉), and still don’t. I also despise shopping online. When I do shop online, I make sure to do it from a store where I can drive to in order to do returns. Do not want to have to ship anything back. And yeah, the mall shops have changed here, too.

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  21. I can’t remember the last time I was at a mall. I do go to Target and Wal-Mart sometimes but not often. Being retired helps keep the clothing budget near zero these days. I make due with what I have. Not always stylish but I’m ok with just clean and comfortable.

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    • Not a fan of Walmart. Our store here is gigantic and always crowded. I can never find anything without asking 3 different people. Target is ok but I don’t buy clothes there. My clothing budget is also low these days but I like new things occasionally even if I don’t need them!

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  22. I never loved shopping, but it was nice to be able to find something that fit and and was flattering in an afternoon. As you say, now it’s chore to find your size and buy it. I think Nordstroms is the only place that actually has associates anymore. Now I’m guessing online and sending stuff back until I figure out what fits. And isn’t that fun when you have a growing boy at home.

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  23. I don’t like shopping for clothing, so my clothing shopping tends to be as I’m wandering through a big box store or wandering through a thrift store. Shoes are as varied in how sizes fit as clothes are. I haven’t been at a mall, strip mall, outlet mall, inside mall in probably 10 years. I have a few “timeless” pieces for dress up and a nice pair of flats and heels (you know I always choose the flats!. Other than that, you’ll find me in shorts and a tee in the summer, sweatpants and a tee in the winter, and a pair of decent jeans and a casual top if I need to go somewhere.

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  24. The clothing industry has focused on cheaply made clothes for some time now with a focus on the latest so-called trends. Jeans that used to last for years barely make it through the season. And those midriff tees and shirts…there are no polite words to describe them. 🤬

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    • I don’t buy those kinds of jeans. I pay more to get good quality although you have to stick with less trendy brands. Can’t do short tees, shirts, sweats. I’ve had to eliminate a specialty store that I used to love. They stuff doesn’t fit like it used to nor do the styles work for me. Too bad because their stuff lasts me many years.

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      • The last pair of Eddie Bauer jeans barely last a year. And they weren’t cheap either. Very disappointing since the prior pair was high quality. Short tees just look dumb on someone our age. And don’t get me started on the high waisted pants. I don’t need to look like Eurkel!

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        • I worked with a guy who wore his pants like Urkel! (Haven’t heard that name in decades!) Costco occasionally sells Eddie Bauer stuff. We don’t have any Bauer stores locally anymore. They must have changed. I have a few brands of jean I love and they usually last for me.

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