An update on people in my life

This is my therapy on the nice days. Right now there aren’t any leaves on the trees and no green stuff on the ground but it’s still peaceful.

My walking buddy – Long time readers may remember back in the old days (before covid) I used to walk regularly with a walking partner who talked all the time. She’s 87 but don’t let the age fool you. She could outwalk and out exercise (and outtalk) many 50-year-old’s.

Her husband was diagnosed with a terminal progressive lung disease five years ago. For the last year she was his caretaker. He died Thanksgiving week. I haven’t seen her since. It was a hectic time for her with all you need to do when someone dies and a lot of mysterious ailments that her doc chalked up to anxiety (after a boatload of tests). I called her yesterday to see if she wanted to walk. No not yet but soon but she did want to talk.

Her main characteristic was constant chatter. When I walked, I could tune it out and let her ramble down rabbit holes on her own giving the occasional ah-huh and head nod. The phone call was no different as she spilled out her stories.

As her husband lay dying someone emptied their bank accounts. I asked questions (inquiring minds want to know! Or maybe we fear we’re next!).

She received an email from her bank or so she thought. It advised her to change her password and gave a link. This is such a standard scam, I’m surprised she fell for it. I’ll chalk that up to the craziness in a household with a dying person in hospice. Once they got her password, they paid bills and credit cards with her account.

The bank tried to get a hold of her suspecting something, but she wasn’t checking email and other notices. Finally, the bank called to tell her she had no money in the account.

I’ll jump to the end. They were able to apprehend the perpetrator, get the money back and she’s pressing charges. Since it wasn’t an overseas hacker (or someone smart), I’ve wondered if it was someone who knew them or at least knew what was going on. I’ve got a very suspicious mind. She’s all good now. She’s got a sharp mind and except for the email, you can’t pull one over on her.

Onto the broken-hearted contractor. Background: This contractor replaced my kitchen window. During the job, his wife left him and he fell apart. He didn’t work for a month leaving us in limbo about our window which hadn’t arrived because his wife cancelled all his orders. Something happened, maybe a savvy lawyer or some good pharmaceuticals but he’s almost normal. (Almost is as good as he gets. He’s a type “A” personality with a touch of mania.) Since we like chaos and suspense (NOT), we are having him do our deck project. He’s a good carpenter and very creative so I’m expecting a good product with some amount of drama. That will start in April. Stay tuned.

That’s all the news from the ‘hood!

49 thoughts on “An update on people in my life

  1. So glad your walking friend is doing a bit better now, and that things have calmed down for her to the extent they can. Hopefully you two will be out walking and talking soon 🙂 Also, hope that your deck project goes smoothly and that things calm down a bit for your carpenter too!

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  2. I hate that people took advantage of your friend when she was at her most vulnerable and like you said, knowing when to strike and getting away with it. Thank goodness they caught the perp. I listen to a feature on my radio station that gives business tips once an hour and you would not believe how many scammers are out there, even calling on a cellphone with the phone number disguised to look like a local exchange and calling back to an international number at the tune of at least $30.00. Glad your carpenter rallied back – most times it is the opposite and the man leaves the women and we blame it on the men. Not so here. You will keep him occupied with the deck work and he’ll return to his new normal much more quickly.

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  3. I am really pleased to read these updates, Kate. I have thought of your walking partner since you shared about her husband’s death and the cleaning out of her bank account. I am glad she’s pressing charges. And your contractor will likely do a wonderful job on your deck. And you’re contributing to his stability. 🙂

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  4. Awful about your friend’s problems. With the world being what it is these days, it doesn’t surprise me. Believe me, though, if a bank is prosecuting the culprit, he will be richly and appropriately rewarded for his evil deed. I may have told you about my sister’s kitchen remodel disaster (somewhat similar to yours) while also caring for a sick, bedfast husband. Well, she told me the last time I spoke to her that her credit card was hacked, and then the new card that replaced it was also hacked. She has no idea how it happened. Makes me want to kiss a rabbit foot and count my blessings.

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  5. I think a lot of therapists just get paid to listen. It’s probably all most people need, someone to just listen from time to time. It’s very hard when you have no one. This is why I have two cats. They charge me in Friskies treats, so for now, I can still afford the therapy. Maybe your friend and contractor could use a pet?

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  6. Good gravy! I’m sorry to read about your chatty walking friend’s experience. That’s awful, but am glad its been resolved. I’m pleased to read about the heart-broken carpenter’s renewal– and am only slightly jealous that you found someone to work on your deck. We’re still empty-handed on that issue.

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  7. Love your idea of therapy! I could definitely be happy walking there. We have just started walking our downtown area and on up to the beach and it is a much better than walking the neighborhood. So much to see. So happy they caught the person that stole your friends money. I am with you and think it sounds like an “inside job.” Absolutely staying tuned for the broken-hearted contractor and the deck! Love outside areas for relaxing and wine time! Good Morning!

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  8. People can be so awful! Stealing someone’s money (a grieving widow, no less) and canceling all orders just to get back at your ex. Good to know your friend got her money back (I wonder if that’s the norm?) and that your contractor has found some “normalcy” again. So nice of you to listen to your friend. I know how exhausting those calls can be but she obviously needed someone to talk to. Looking forward to hearing about your deck.

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  9. I’m glad both people’s stories have a happy pause, if not a happy ending. How awful to have your money stolen while you are dealing with death!! I’m so glad she got the money back. Here’s hoping your contractor will be on an even keel while working on your next project.

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  10. Scammers really make me angry. A few years ago I kept getting calls re the Microsoft scam. That is so old that I can’t believe people still fall for it. I told the callers they ought to be ashamed of themselves and some still tried to convince me it was real. I could see my dad, who used to work with computers and was not dumb by any means, falling for that scam or even the one your friend fell for. It is so rare to get good outcomes from these sorts of things so I am very glad for your friend.

    Ally reminded me about your blog. I have not been very active in – well a while – and have not been around. Nice to see that you’re still posting and I hope to read more often.

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  11. How awful for your walking friend. It is easy to be caught off guard when there are heavy things of life and death that are being dealt with. Good to know the stupid thief got caught and the money returned.
    You are lucky to have found a contractor that you are happy with and the finished project is what you want. His being manic is just part of who he is.🙃

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    • The timing was terrible. She seems ok but there is still so much to do. She is selling/donating a lot of her husband’s things — clothes, tools and things that she would never use. I admire her spunk.

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  12. Thank you for the follow up to your walking friend’s story, and I’m so glad to read it was a positive ending. There should be a special jail for these scammers, and they could work 8 hours a day at some job that pays a wage that goes directly to the people they have duped. Shame on them. Glad your carpenter is coming around. Not easy to go through a breakup.

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  13. Everyone has a story (some more than others). All we have to do is listen. You must be a sympathetic listener. Hope the deck will be wonderful and the walker up to joining you before long.

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  14. When I read stories like this of people being preyed upon at vulnerable times in their lives (or any time, really), I have to wonder how many of these scammers can actually live with this on their conscience. Or maybe they don’t have consciences??? How do they justify their actions? I just don’t understand. I’m glad all was restored and the perp was caught. I commend you for sticking with your contractor and I hope he appreciates your continued faith in him. Thanks for the updates, Kate.

    Deb

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  15. we hope the best for your carpenter… and we are glad your walking partner got the money back… it sometimes happens, that we see the tree but not the forest… I clicked on a link too what asked for my datas…. the trouble was ginormous… and now I have a sh*t password I can not remember…sigh ;O((((((

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  16. Oh gosh, your poor friend. So sorry for her loss, both in terms of her husband as well as the bank account. Even though the perp was found and the account restored, it’s such a violation when you’ve been scammed like that. Glad the contractor is recovering and another project may be just what the doctor ordered. And can I just say, your therapist looks amazing!

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  17. That’s so upsetting about your walking buddy. Thank heavens it had a happy ending but imagine the mess to unravel all of that and at a time like that in her life too. Bless her heart. As for the broken-hearted contractor glad that you have him doing your deck if he’s a great carpenter – let’s hope he doesn’t acquire a new girlfriend who dumps him during the build!!! EEEEEK!

    Hugs, Pam

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  18. We have a fantastic contractor who has done all the carpentry type work (raising the second floor that was trying to join the first floor, laying down new luxury vinyl floors, etc.) all without drama. But he is getting up there in years and I know he will retire at some point…which we dread! He’s just so good and reliable. I’m hoping one of his staff takes over the business. They’ve all been very good too.

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    • His guy is good but manic. He is very creative. The carpenter who did the actual kitchen work is phenomenal but he’s around 65. He has bad knees so he doesn’t like a lot of ladder work. He redid the floor in the laundry room and took out a useless closest but I doubt he’d be interested in a deck hanging off the second story. I’m keeping his number though. I love your floors.

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