Sometimes you don’t know someone – Locally we had a car bombing. It’s unusual for our area. Three people died. One of them created and set off the bomb killing his 2-year-old son and an older acquaintance. Immediately after the explosion but prior to the investigation, the family of the young man posted about what a wonderful person he is. Best dad, best son, best brother, wouldn’t hurt a fly, etc. Turns out that he’s not such a great guy and he killed his own son. It must be incredibly painful for the family. How well do we really know anyone?
Speaking of unhappy – This week someone I knew from my working days posted a long rant on Facebook. (No, it wasn’t political.) Her life for the past several years has been incredibly difficult with major health issues for both her and her husband. I was surprised that she revealed such personal feelings on Facebook. People reached out to her. She had moved away many years ago so folks from her hometown didn’t know. Asking for help, no matter how, is better than the alternative.
Something I thought I’d never see – I saw a commercial asking liberal democrats to call their senators and ask them to approve Kavanaugh. Really? Politicking for the Supreme Court?
Getting old – With the good weather we’ve had this past week, we did a lot of outdoor work. We spent several hours on consecutive days doing very physical projects. It’s not only about the time but the energy it took. My normal work backed up. Technically I had time to do some of it but I didn’t have the energy. Where are the days when I could work from sunup to sundown to finish a project?
Fall brings a different energy – Each season has its own pace. Summer is less hectic and more laid back. Schools are out for all levels. Morning traffic is lighter. Fall came in with a bang. Much heavier traffic in the morning with added school buses to dodge. People aren’t taking as many vacations. It also brings in a holiday feeling. On the first cool day I get the urge to buy a pumpkin and mum. This year I changed up the mantel (hoping that my cat Morgan wouldn’t inspect or nap in it). It’s a satisfying start to the holiday season.
So how was your week?
We see that all the time, don’t we. Someone kills their family or goes on a rampage and those who knew the person speaks about how they never would have thought it would have been that individual. You’re right, we don’t know what goes on in the heads of others.
I find myself working for hours some days but feeling like I worked for days when it’s over. The gym helps a bit but time shoves reality in our faces these days..:)
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There is always someone — that neighbor or co-worker — who will say they were kind of weird. Maybe family doesn’t see weird.
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Fall me for me, is the most relaxing, and laid back perfect time of the year 🙂 Boy, do I ever recall working from sun up, to sundown! alas, those 30-something years are long gone! Even the cats agree as they sit, and bask in the warmth of their blankets near the balcony window, enjoying the rays of the warmth from the sun. A perfect morning for me, my coffee, and petting my cats as I watch the leaves fall upon the ground outside, and the frost covering the grass, and the trees.
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Fall isn’t so bad but it’s a harbinger of winter which I’m not a fan of. I love the cooler temps, fresh apples and hot drinks but I miss the cold drinks on the porch and friends sitting out there until dark. Each season has a good part to it. Even winter although that one hangs around a lot longer than it should!
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Agreed. Being Canadian, i love the serenity and quiet of fall, and winter. It inspires fantastic poetry whilst petting the kitties, sipping coffee. Sadly, at the coast of BC here, our winter last a whole day! pffffft! i say! 😀
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Perhaps if you had our winters of 70 inches of snow and three very cold months, it may lose it’s allure. I’d love a day of winter.
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Had that in Calgary 🙂 10 months of brutally cold winter, deep snow, blizzards, bone chilling cold 😀 love it!
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OMG! You are definitely living in the wrong place!
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Sad, but true 😀
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Your mantel looks pretty. Perfect for the season. A season that has yet to really arrive here. Still so hot.
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It’s warm here too. My pumpkin on the front porch may be slowly rotting.
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Twilight Zone has become the current reality.
We’re close to the big city and the news is constantly full of violence. What gets me is the media/family will out up a picture of the criminal that was taken when he/she was in 6th grade or church – years and years old. Then a day or two later you see the actual criminal in court/captured and the real picture is a thug – dangerous looking image. What’s with people? Wishful thinking? Looking to drum up sympathy/ go fund me money/divert attention form the real situation? Now when a story comes across, I’m constantly thinking there’s more to this story than they are giving us…(and sometimes the media loses interest and never gives the real facts – you only know if the victims/family of victims are determined to let people know.
The adopted orphan on your mantel looks very content. He must like cats, too. and grateful he’s not out in the rain rotting like the pumpkins here (time seems to make us all mushy and sluggish eventually?)…found a nice terra-cotta one a few years ago – it’s great: turn the face(with candle) towards the street for Halloween and turn it around for just porch fall vegetable for Thanksgiving.
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I have a big ceramic pumpkin and I do the same thing. Hard to understand people. I understand supporting family but don’t be in denial about it. If someone is a jerk don’t paint a different picture. I take all information with a grain of salt. In this case the family denied the investigation results until they received the letter he sent before incinerating half a block. If he hadn’t sent it I wonder if they would have gotten an attorney to sue someone.
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The man who created the car bomb reminds me of the man who stole and crashed a passenger plane from Seattle-Tacoma Airport. In both cases no one suspected they would ever do such a thing. Maybe some people realized they weren’t what they seemed to be and just didn’t say anything. Or maybe absolutely everyone was surprised. People and their actions can’t always be explained, even though we wish they could be. Maybe that’s why we like to read mysteries. We always find out who did it in the end, and we usually understand why.
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I always want to know the motive. It feels safer when you understand why they are doing something especially when it’s heinous.
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Me too. We always believe there’s a reason, if we could only understand it.
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I’m saddened to hear the story of the bombing and, in particular, the loss of a young life. I feel so sorry for the child’s mother and extended family. People make such tragic decisions! Your mantel is beautiful, and I hope the cats leave it just as is. 🙂 I lost a friend this past week. You’ve mentioned similar losses over the last year or so, so you, as well as everyone really, knows that heartache creeps in. I took a few days to indulge in feelings and do nothing more than what I absolutely needed to do and now here we have another week and I’m focused on appreciating the beauty of fall. It really is a lovely season, even here in California where the changes are subtle. I still like it. 🙂
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I am sorry for your loss. It is best to feel your way through the feelings. A change of seasons is refreshing!
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Love the spidey and the whole mantel. Haven’t done a thing to decorate for fall or Halloween. I quit doing Halloween a long time ago. The bombing leaves me speechless, sad.
We finally made it to the beach. No red tide, no stink. It was wonderful. Dew point is beginning to drop and it has cooled off a tiny bit.
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I don’t always do fall. Sometimes I put a small pumpkin there and call it a day. Christmas I will do but not a lot. Maybe the mantel and the dining room table (so the cats have something to sleep on!).
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The dining room table for sure! For the cats… 🙂
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Hazel especially loves to sleep curled around whatever is in the middle. I can’t do tablecloths (unless I put on right before people come over) because that’s even more inviting. The table is hard. I don’t understand the attraction.
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I was thinking about Hazel! It’s up high sort of and the view with windows is great? They can keep track of all the goings on?
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There are better spots for looking out windows. Hazel loves the ottoman in the office. It’s cushioned at window height but the table is still her favorite. She stretches out and takes up half of it.
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Only Hazel knows and she isn’t talking!
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The bomb thing threw me for a loop. I had that case all wrapped up with it being a hit of some sort, not an unhappy father who saw no other way out. Such sadness.
I’m in LOVE with the mantel wall! It’s gorgeous!
I will say it here first “I’m officially too old to help move anyone from anywhere ever.”
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I use the age card a lot these days. Moving is a definite!
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Oh my gosh about the bomb! That is awful! I just never will understand some people!
Hard to believe it’s October when we had it in the 80’s today! But perfect weather for the beach for the next couple days so not complaining. 🙂 My week will be starting off great tomorrow. Wishing you a happy week!
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Thanks! I believe that people are allowed to kill themselves. They can make that choice but it is so wrong to take out a bunch of people with you. Enjoy the beach. We thought about going during September but were never confident on the weather.
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I like that little touch of Fall on the mantel. I was close to my neighbor Marge who passed away last August. Some of her grandchildren “friended” me on Facebook. I have nothing in common with them as they are at least 30-35 years younger than me and I have turned their notifications off, but I pop on their “wall” from time to time and was horrified to see one of the girls, whose father still lives next door in his mom’s house, was telling about how her live-in boyfriend had repeatedly beat her up and dragged her by her hair around the house – she hid her bruises. The last time she escaped from him, hid and as he searched for her outside the house, she called the police who came and arrested him. I’ve met the girl, never met the boyfriend, but they lived together for about five years. I was shocked. Evidently, the majority of her Facebook friends didn’t have a clue either judging from the comments. They had split up in the Summer, and she moved out of his house – I was kind of surprised, but didn’t think much of it at that time. But her father and mother split up and he moved next door after he had been drinking and pushed his wife and she fell on the floor – ordered him out. Perhaps that happened on a regular basis so she let it happen longer than she should have. I had a co-worker years ago in the same situation. Her father beat up her mother for decades and she got into the same type of relationship. She lived with him for several years before marrying him and confided in me and showed me bruises – everywhere but her face.
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There is a whole psychology around that. When I was in human resources we had a few cases. Prior to that I worked with one woman who was convinced that she had no other options yet she was the breadwinner in the family. She was that scared.
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That’s so scary Kate … and after I commented I realized I should have said that not only the granddaughter was abused by her boyfriend all those years, her mom by her father, but her grandmother (my good friend/neighbor Marge) was similarly abused by her husband. They moved here in 1992 and we did not know them that well – they moved in late Fall. We got to know her better the following Summer. Her husband was an alcoholic and quit work in his late 50s to be on the “liver list” at U of M Hospital. But at that time he was working, she came over to our house one day while I was at worked. Spilled her life story to my mom – my mom told me at dinner “I never asked, she just kept talking” … apparently, her husband was drunk one night and he was a hunter and took the rifle out of the gun cabinet and pointed it at her. He was not a big man but she was quite petite – he threatened her and she ran out of the house into the snow. It was after they moved here, but she didn’t know us. No cellphones back in 1992 – at least they might have been around, but she didn’t have one. In the snow, no coat, and he locked the door. She walked to a restaurant and called one of her kids to take her to the police to lay a charge against him. Police didn’t believe her. A few months later, he pulled the same trick but HE called the police and said she was trying to kill HIM. Marge spent the night at the Lincoln Park Police Station to “cool off” as the police called it. Likewise all the kids are alcoholics – kids see more than you think they do.
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That is a sad story. Often the police aren’t (or can’t be because the woman wants to drop the charges) helpful. I can’t believe they thought a small stature woman was a threat to him. Alcoholism runs in families. I hope the kids don’t abuse their spouses.
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The two boys both did. One is divorced and lives the next door – the other one had a stroke and died in his 40s. Marge’s daughter lives in a tented community in San Diego … she is a drug addict and has lived there about 4 years now, having taken a bus there because the drugs are plentiful and cheap. She has had Hepatitis and landed in the hospital many times … I don’t know anymore about her since Marge passed away in August 2017. She lives with a guy she met in rehab here in Michigan. She was in rehab as she remarried and was riding around in the middle of the night, very drunk with her toddlers in the back seat of the car. She did jail time for that and was sent to rehab after. Her husband got custody of the kids, divorced her, but he’s no angel – he lost his truck, his job, and his house because he had a big cocaine habit. A friend got him a job in Nevada so he moved there. He is an electrician who had a good job at Ford. The kids are grown, went to college, one is in the last year of nursing school, the other had some college and is a licensed massage therapist. Her first two kids … one OD and died and the other one, a girl, works as a bartender. Sad story lasting multiple generations – we didn’t understand why the police would believe him and not her either. Maybe she left out something in the story??
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Wow. That crap does run in families. It’s a hard pattern to break.
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I know – some of the things Marge would tell my mom and me, we’d try not to cringe – really bad things and seemingly each generation thinking it was just “acceptable behavior” since they had witnessed it their entire life. It is no wonder Marge had the bout of shingles that was so bad that I mentioned to you. The first grandson was staying at her house after getting out of jail. He met a girl, she got pregnant and they were staying at Marge’s house. He overdosed in her bathroom, overnight, by the time he was discovered by Marge who had to pee, (imagine her horror), she called 911, they took him to the nearest hospital, but he was brain dead. He had 26 types of drugs in his system. His organs could not be donated except to someone else with a drug dependency. His daughter (Marge’s great-granddaughter) was removed from the house by Child Protective Services so the girlfriend had to go ASAP. Marge was not allowed to see he child again, in or out of the house. I learned a lot about what goes on in the world, things I may have read about, drug issues I may have worked on at work (drugs and harassment being the biggest issues in most workplaces). Sometimes she’d tell me stories about the family – SMH. She had no idea about Jeff’s daughter’s boyfriend … she said “she’ll marry that boy one day – he’s a nice boy.”
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I love your mantle and the entire fireplace wall. And the aging thing reminds me of my Dad always saying, “Never leave a job undone.” Ha. He never saw this age thing coming!
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I’ve learned to break jobs that I used to do in a day into segments to do over several days. I used to close the pond in a day. Now I do different aspects over 3 days and I’m much happier. I also stopped with all the flowers. Just a few but not too many because it’s work to plant, water and then clean them up. We downsized the collections in the bookshelves. Although I like the look, I wouldn’t do bookshelves again. Dust collectors. OMG! I’m sounding old, aren’t I?
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Not old….just wise!
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Too soon old and too late wise!
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Your fireplace area is beautiful. Ours isn’t decorated, but at least it is reasonably clean.
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I don’t always move stuff around on it (except to clean) but I had the spirit this year!
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Very nice mantel, Kate. Has Morgan (et al) inspected it yet?
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As far as I know, she hasn’t been up there. There are no hair balls on the new carpets either. All good!
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Ooooh, I saw the news about that car bombing. Of course, I had no idea it was near you. How awful.
Yes, it’s indeed crazy when ordinary citizens are brought into a Supreme Court nomination. That’s supposed to be decided by elected officials and not taken down to local levels.
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It’s a crazy time. There’s nothing else to say.
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Stuff like that (car bombing of a 2 year old? Really?) make us all shake our heads and wonder what the hell we live next to. I am an empath so people tell me their stories; I’ve been told I have the “Mother” energy. Good luck with that on a plane; the stuff ppl have shared with me, oh Mylanta.
Temps dropped 30 degrees over 2 days — I bought 2 $5 Mums and hope for the best .. meanwhile my little summer flowers are hanging on for dear life — no frost here yet, but we’re close.
Good luck keeping the mantle intact 🙂
MJ
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We are going back up to the 80s this week. Crazy! I am not an empath and I always said it helped me to human resource work. I never got sucked in.
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I got my fall and Halloween decorations out yesterday. We don’t get the normal seasonal changes here, so I add some autumn colors inside my home. And, I love Halloween… the creepier the better. We get about two trick or treaters but that doesn’t stop e from adding a few ghouls to our front porch. Boo!
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We have had years when we got none and years when there have been a few. It’s hard to plan for so now we just go out for dinner on trick or treat night. I don’t have to have candy around the house.
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The photo of the room you posted is so lovely! I really like the lantern on your mantel! I am an early season decorator. I have had my fall (not Halloween) decor our since right after Labor Day! I just love the season so much (even though it doesn’t feel like fall in my area of the country just yet) I can’t wait to enjoy the sights, smells and colors!
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I have been getting hungry for pumpkin stuff. I had some pumpkin pie and tried pumpkin cookies today. I’m not sure if you can see it but there is a chenille spider next to the lantern on the plant. Sort of Halloween!
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You and my sister, alike. Changing the mantel for each season. p.s. hart or hard time? As for energy, if you find where you can get it, let me know. I need some.
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Thanks for catching my typo! I don’t change it for every season. Wish I had that energy! There is summer, fall and Christmas. Then we go right back to the summer even if it’s still winter. If I could bottle and sell energy, I’d be rich!
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That’s a lovely room Kate.
We’ve had a pretty good couple of days…… Hubby’s got the PIR up and working for the back garden, and he’s cut both lawns, hopefully for the last time this year.
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Thanks! We will be mowing until Thanksgiving. Our grass is very lush with all the rain and warm weather.
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Our grass seed is doing pretty well, pigeons and doves permitting! Hubby says we’ll have a nice lawn in patches.
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It takes time. You’ve been giving some love.
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🙂
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I was so sad our expected rainfall didn’t materialize. On the other handy, my lofty ladies (huge yellow marigolds) didn’t get beaten down.
And we’re having a cool fall (60s-70s), which is amazing for SoCal. Usually Sept is our super hot month.
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Well, we have your 80s!
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So nice to have some decent days for a change! Loving the cooler days and nights. So are the dogs.
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Today is not really cooler although we did a a few days this past week. Days are decent though.
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How often people find that they never really knew someone. People carrying negative, sorrowful, hateful weights are more likely these days to reveal themselves online–often anonymously. Sad but true.
That commercial could have been one of the Russian bots messing with us. 😉
We’ve had winter weather up here already. Some people have had snow. Already been down into the 20s at night. Came quickly. Kids will be trick or treating in parkas!
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Wow! We are still in the low 80s with humidity (unusual for us at this time). Never know what to wear from day to day.
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We had a day where the weather turned cold and rainy — for about 2 hours. By noon it was up to 78 degrees. I had thought of making stew or soup for dinner but by the time it came around to eat it was too hot to think of that. Crazy. Love the mantle. Crossing fingers for the scarecrow 🙂
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We had soup last week when it was a little cooler.
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Call me cynical but when people leave posts it makes me think about how great they are on social media, not only do I roll my eyes but also think they’re probably closer to the opposite. Sorry your community is experiencing the aftermath of such a monstrous act. Good luck on the mantel staying undisturbed.
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So far no mantel attack!
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I heard about the bombing, Kate…so sad. Still waiting on some fall temps here. I’m afraid it’s going to go from hot to cold. Boo!
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We have not had true fall temps for our area. Expected low 80s and humid this week. More like August. I’m not complaining because it’s cooling off at night and that makes a difference.
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I thought . . . pumpkins? It’s too early for pumpkins.
And then it hit me ~> it’s OCTOBER. Halloween is just 3 weeks away.
Mea Culpa. 😦
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P.S. That scarecrow is toast.
Signed,
Morgan
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It’s hard to believe but it is October! We are not having October weather so I hope the pumpkin lasts. As for the scarecrow, it’s been there 4 days. Fingers crossed but I saw her eyeing it. I took all breakables away from that end. Still, that straw is enticing….
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No hairball on the new carpets yet!
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Your comment about getting old rang so true for me. There was a time when I thought I could do anything as long as I had time and money. Now I’ve had to add the 3rd element – energy. It just ain’t there the way it used to be!!
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So true. I’m better in the morning but wane badly mid-afternoon.
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I find them so impressive, the way they grow. Nature really was showing off when she designed pumpkins. George could run for the Supreme Court. Pretty soon, he’ll be able to the rate things are gong. grrrrrr
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If you really look at most vegetables, they are beauties. Colorful and some have sass! George (the pumpkin) would be a winner.
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5.99 The cab, 12 bucks. Only in New York, and when I asked Mohammed the driver to at least open the door, he got annoyed. Mike the doorman came to my rescue and picked George up like he was light as a feather. Fuck Mohammed and the camel he rode in on.
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Hope you didn’t tip him much.
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A coupla bucks…karma rules, but his…fagettaboutit.
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I love kibitzing in on your comments. Of course now i have nothing to say. You’re thinking, yeah right—since when. Since you put it that way, you mentioned the Holidaze, well, guess who just hauled down her Xmas cards. Yes, she buys them end of season, when they’re marked down, the little neurotic consumer she is. Heard a guy snoring. It’s my Avon Santa I got with a coupon. He’s very cute. Winds up and shakes his hips like Elvis to Jingle Bells. Let me know if you want to borrow him…he’s never been to Pennsylvania. 🙂
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I remember that Elvis Santa. I would turn it on every time I was in the store but I didn’t buy it. (No, he wouldn’t like PA. Not after NYC!) I love conversations on blogs. It makes it more interesting to read the comments.
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Last year he had a short, but Frank the super fixed him with a screwdriver. Personally, I think he was just hungover. All that Xmas cheer. 🙂
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Maybe he just needed a new battery. I know that feeling.
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He need fewer carbs.
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I know that feeling too.
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So sorry to hear about the car bombing. No, we don’t really know people do we?
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No we don’t. Not if people don’t want us to.
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Me too. You really don’t know anyone deep down. He was clearly a bomb ticking, no pun intended. Kids. Are they ever truly safe?
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Perhaps my take-a-way in watching this unfold was that the family fought the findings of the police until they got a letter he sent them confessing this and more. They continue defending him, saying he had a mental illness (which they had denied). Denial is a special place. I want to make sure that I don’t get snared there when it comes to life and death situations.
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This sounds so familiar, the family in denial. Is it really care for the individual or cover for themselves? No one wants a Son of Sam alighting from the family tree. They’d rather pretend it’s low blood sugar that makes them suddenly rage. Sigh
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Got two big pumpkins sitting on the porch. 🙂 But we are supposed to have yet more 80 degree weather next week. Hope they last until Halloween!
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Mine too. We are predicted to have a hot humid few days. I worry about the mum too.
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I just bought a pumpkin at Whole Foods the size of Kansas for the two little girls next door. The taxi getting it home cost more than the pumpkin. They named it, George. Gotta love kids.
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Holy cow! My pumpkin isn’t that big! Next year (or maybe at the end of this season) I am going to look for a very large wooden one for the porch. I won’t have to worry about it rotting in unseasonably warm weather.
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