Eager shoppers are gullible. Need a new frying pan? You read all about how well the new ones work. You buy it only to find out it works the same way your old one did.
Need new lipstick? The new ones last longer, retain more color (as long as 18 hours!) and actually make your lips look younger. If you believe that I have a bridge for sale!
I am not always gullible but you have to buy stuff. You run out of things or things break and you need a new one. A savvy shopper will check out what’s new in features or colors or whatever before making the decision.
I use a self-tanner on my legs. Streaky orange legs look better than pasty white ones. In fact, people are so intrigued by the stripes that they don’t see the liver marks and wrinkly skin. That’s a win-win all the way around.
This morning I was lathering on my gradual orange tanner. You use it every day and it colors just a little. That is so you aren’t white one day and orange the next. The container is from last year and it’s almost gone so I need to buy more.
Some of the 2013 self tanners use terms like in-home spa treatment (does it come with a cabana boy?); Greek sun kissed tan (a trip to Athens?); no streaks (really?).
Oh how I want to believe them!
I have been reading that the new ones (even from the manufacturer I use) don’t have “that” smell. I think they said that last year when I bought this one. I also noticed that my current container said “firming.” I don’t think I bought it for that purpose but there is nothing wrong with a little firming!
But what does that mean? Other than pasty white and full of…ummm….freckles, my legs are ok (at least for my age). I don’t have cankles. However, my thighs, which are not humongous, have loose skin. I have no idea where it came from.
One night I went to bed with gorgeous thighs and the next morning I had enough skin there for 3 people. Perhaps it was one of the alien probe jobs gone bad. Or perhaps some sort of experiment (again…gone bad!).
I don’t worry too much because it has been years since I paraded my thighs around naked. My shorts are knee knockers so all is good.
So….my thighs would be a good experiment for “firming” body lotion with an orange afterglow. You would think, right? Well, not! I have been using this lotion for at least 3 years and nothing has changed.
Seriously, who would believe that lotion can firm up jiggly skin? If you do, please contact me about that bridge! In the meantime watch out for alien aircraft.