Source: clipartbest.com
December 22, 2014 9:30 am
Source: clipartbest.com
I recently lost a friend. I met her through the Toastmaster’s (public speaking) organization.
We worked together on several projects over the years and got to know each other well. Sometimes we had lunch.
A great speaker with a smooth voice, she did voice-overs part-time and a lot of other things too. Occasionally I would hear her on commercials.
She was a free spirit, very laid back and the perennial hippie all rolled into one.
I don’t think I ever saw her outside of jeans. Her hairdos were always a no-fuss style with little to no make-up.
She co-authored a book and was an avid reader, hosting functions and encouraging others.
She was a great friend. She read and commented on my blog especially at the beginning when I had two readers. In return I edited her book.
During her illness she maintained a blog on caringbridge.org where she posted upbeat accounts of her health and treatments. I don’t think she ever lost hope so I was stunned and saddened when her daughter posted her dire status a few days before her death.
She was a woman of incredible faith and her concern was always for her family. She had no fear of death.
The world will be a sadder place without her. Some people incite memorable stories and she is one of those people. I remember some great “Ruth” stories.
Over the course of our association with Toastmasters, I heard her speak many times. Another Toastmaster reminded me of an unusual speech she gave about dying.
She had an envelope labeled “if I die.” In it along with “those” important papers she had a photo for her obituary so her family would use a “good” one.
Nope, she did not want her high school graduation photo or a snapshot in a swimsuit. She was in her 40s at the time of the speech. Who thinks like that?
I wasn’t surprised to see her obituary accompanied by a great head shot along with accurate details of her interests and accomplishments. Even in the end she was in charge and directing things.
For Ruth, peace.
Posted by Kate Crimmins
Categories: Random Five
Tags: Death, encouragement, friendship, Funerals, grief, memories, obituaries, Toastmasters, Writing
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This made me cry…so sorry.
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By Susannah Bianchi on December 24, 2014 at 1:56 am
Oops! I wanted it to be upbeat.
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By katecrimmins on December 24, 2014 at 9:10 am
It was…remembering her. But I’ve lost two of my best friends so, that’s what it brought up for me…but it was truly a sweet testament to someone you loved and admired. We can’t always be light and funny. It’s good when we air our sad side.
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By Susannah Bianchi on December 24, 2014 at 2:23 pm
You are right. It’s been hard to be funny this season. Too much stuff going on.
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By katecrimmins on December 24, 2014 at 2:31 pm
Sorry for your loss Kate. Thank you for sharing her with all of us.
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By Life With The Top Down on December 23, 2014 at 7:21 am
Thanks for stopping by.
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By katecrimmins on December 23, 2014 at 11:24 am
How kind of her to visit your blog in the beginning. You were blessed to have a kindred creative spirit as your friend. I’m so sorry for your loss.
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By georgettesullins on December 23, 2014 at 6:50 am
She was. Several of my friends were supportive of my blog at the beginning but she was one who would fearlessly comment. She was a talented writer herself.
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By katecrimmins on December 23, 2014 at 11:25 am
So beautifully written. My condolances for your loss.
❤ Jules
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By katespadegirl on December 23, 2014 at 1:47 am
Thanks.
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By katecrimmins on December 23, 2014 at 11:25 am
Aww … she sounds like someone we all would have loved to have called our own. Sorry for your loss, Kate, and I hope you’ll write about her again sometime.
MJ
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By emjayandthem on December 22, 2014 at 9:43 pm
Maybe sometime. We were in Toastmaster’s together for about 10 years. I know her through her speeches.
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By katecrimmins on December 23, 2014 at 11:33 am
Kate, my condolences. If you are so inclined, please do share some of “Ruth” stories. Would love to hear you talk about her.
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By seeker on December 22, 2014 at 9:28 pm
Perhaps in the future….
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By katecrimmins on December 23, 2014 at 11:33 am
Beautiful testament to your friend, Kate. Thanks for sharing her. I’m sorry for your loss, too.
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By Elyse on December 22, 2014 at 6:01 pm
She was a great person.
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By katecrimmins on December 22, 2014 at 7:42 pm
It’s a beautiful tribute. And must have been hard to write while you still hurt from the loss. Death at any age is difficult for the survivors. Death at 53 simply shouldn’t be. Ruth seems to have impressed you very much as long as she lived. I’m sure her memory will remain with you as long as you do. But for right now, I’m so sorry….
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By ninamishkin on December 22, 2014 at 1:51 pm
There are a lot of “Ruth” stories. Perhaps at some point her Toastmaster friends will get together to remember her.
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By katecrimmins on December 22, 2014 at 4:32 pm
I’m so sorry Kate…very sad.
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By derrycats on December 22, 2014 at 1:32 pm
Thanks.
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By katecrimmins on December 22, 2014 at 4:31 pm
I’m sorry to hear of the loss of your friend. Your kind words are a lovely way to remember those things that were unique and admirable, and she certainly sounds like someone who would be interesting to have known. As with every season of life, it can be tough to adjust to a world without certain people in it, but thankfully, we can hold on to our memories, and let those memories put a smile in our heart. As you said yourself, death has no calendar. Prayers for her family, and also, for you. Sorry for your loss.
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By ntexas99 on December 22, 2014 at 1:29 pm
Prayers for her family are good. They will feel her loss.
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By katecrimmins on December 23, 2014 at 11:34 am
Such a beautiful tribute to your friend, Kate. I’m sorry for your loss. Just this morning, I learned that my coworker’s wife died suddenly early yesterday, she hadn’t been ill and was in her early 50’s. Life is so fragile…
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By Jill Weatherholt on December 22, 2014 at 12:35 pm
My friend has been ill. She had a type of cancer that I’m not familiar with but she was only 53. Much too young. I am so sorry for your co-worker. There wasn’t any time for closures. That is really hard.
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By katecrimmins on December 22, 2014 at 12:37 pm
Thank you, Kate. Yes, your friend was much too young.
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By Jill Weatherholt on December 22, 2014 at 4:06 pm
Yes she was. For many years I thought she was closer to me in age because she was truly a timeless soul.
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By katecrimmins on December 22, 2014 at 4:34 pm
Well written honor. The world may be sadder right now, but for those who remember her sparkle, she’ll bring smiles for a long long time.
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By philosophermouseofthehedge on December 22, 2014 at 11:42 am
Yes and funny stories too.
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By katecrimmins on December 22, 2014 at 12:32 pm
Helen Keller is quoted…’So long as the memory of certain beloved friends lives in my heart, I shall say that life is good’.
There are people…and then, there are ‘special’ people; people like Ruth that you’ve written of so beautifully. I’m sure she is smiling.
Thank you…you are loved…and life is good.
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By Vasca on December 22, 2014 at 11:13 am
That is a wonderful quote.
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By katecrimmins on December 22, 2014 at 12:35 pm
Ruth sounds like a lovely person and a good friend. It just doesn’t seem fair sometimes when such a force leaves this world way too soon.
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By Retirementallychallenged.com on December 22, 2014 at 11:04 am
At such a young age too.
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By katecrimmins on December 22, 2014 at 12:35 pm
We have friends and then friends who really make an impression/impact on us. Your writeup sounds like she was special to many who met her. I have a few acquaintances like that and fortunately they are still around.
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By ladysighs on December 22, 2014 at 10:55 am
She is only 53 so it’s quite a shock but she has been ill for about a year. She’s one of those people that you can count on to help out on most projects.
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By katecrimmins on December 22, 2014 at 12:34 pm
Just yesterday I lost a beloved brother-in-law. I know how you feel. Rest in peace, Ruth.
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By oldgirlnewtricks on December 22, 2014 at 10:27 am
I am sorry for your loss. It’s such a tough time of the year for death but death knows no calendars.
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By katecrimmins on December 22, 2014 at 10:29 am
Kate,
That was indeed a lovely tribute to your friend. I hope her family sees it. You had a great friendship and I am glad you have wonderful memories of her. May she rest in peace.
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By Lynn on December 22, 2014 at 10:10 am
Thanks. She was an interesting person. She walked to the beat of a different drummer and I always admired that.
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By katecrimmins on December 22, 2014 at 10:21 am
A lovely tribute. So sorry for your loss.
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By Eileen Adickes on December 22, 2014 at 9:44 am
She will be missed.
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By katecrimmins on December 22, 2014 at 9:51 am
Lovely testament to Ruth. She sounds like someone I would have enjoyed meeting.
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By nrhatch on December 22, 2014 at 9:40 am
Yes, you would have. She had some of the same characteristics that you do.
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By katecrimmins on December 22, 2014 at 9:42 am