Sassy cats — Morgan the perfect cat, Part 2

Technically this is about all the cats but Morgan caused it all.

Quick background: I went to the local animal shelter to donate towels and came home with a one-eyed cat. She was younger than I thought. After introducing to my other three cats I found out she had one-celled thingies in her digestive tract. All the cats had to be pilled 3 times a day for a week. So starts the saga….

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The meds — oh yes, different pills for different sized cats.

Bringing a new cat home to an existing brood is always stressful. I am not sure if it was more stressful to the cats or to me. I am a worrywart so it was me. My two lady cats took to her right away. Yes, there was hissing but very little.

I hate pills. I had to wash it down with catnip! — Jake

My drama queen guy cat was the king of hissy fits. He actually hit me on the head and said, “Cupcake, what were you thinking?” Seriously! (Yes, he calls me Cupcake. It’s hard to get respect with cats.)

Day 1 and 2 were uneventful as I kept her isolated to get the feel and smell of the house.

Day 3: Jake, who is a tall, long cat overshot the litter box and peed all over the bathroom where I had set up a spare box. We had a conversation. He said his equipment is too big for the small litter box. (Believe me it’s not small — the box that is. Not sure about the equipment as I am not an expert in feline genitalia.) He said he couldn’t help it if he was well endowed. I just rolled my eyes. There is an acre of litter boxes elsewhere that he could have used. I had to clean the bathroom.

Day 4: Initial medication is liquid, $120. No one likes it and everyone spit, foamed at the mouth and sprayed it all over. Called vet for a different form. I got pills. The vet took pity and charged me $20. I had to completely clean the kitchen.

Day 5: The pilling starts. One cat won’t take pills so I crush it in food and wait all day for her to eat it. One cat takes them in pill pockets. Jake is cranky but takes them normally. The little one ate the pill pockets. All this took most of the day. Pilling cats is a full-time job.

Day 6: The crushed food cat won’t eat the food with the pill (so she didn’t get her dose) but the pill pocket cats still take it that way. Jake a.k.a. Crankypants is even more cranky.

Day 7: The pill pocket cats have learned how to eat the pill pocket and spit out the pill. I have another discussion with the vet tech. I plead with her to move in for a  week only to hear roaring laughter. She says I need to toughen up and quit the “coochy-coochy stuff.” I am pissed (that’s a technical term) but not at her. How can such little critters get me so flummoxed. Each cat gets put on the washer and they either get my finger in their mouth or a syringe-like pill plunger. Only one pill goes in back of the washer, ok maybe two. Jake is beyond cranky. He is considering going to court for emancipation.

Day 8: I am businesslike and quick. All cats are pilled in under an hour. I find one pill crushed on the bottom of my shoe. I consider it all a success. Jake loses emancipation case as he cannot inject himself with insulin. Judge dismisses.

Day 9: I am cutting the time down to 30 minutes now. I am on a roll but I did have one clawing incident that drew blood. Battle wounds. I am expecting a purple heart for this. Chocolate helps heal.

Day 10, 11, 12 and 13: No big deal. Done in less than 10 minutes. In fact I am considering starting a business, Cat Piller for Hire…or maybe Have Pill Plunger Will Travel.

I wrote this in 2013 when it happened. This was the start of Morgan’s life here. I was hoping it wasn’t an omen. Oh dear, I didn’t explain why she’s the perfect cat. You can see that next week in the season finale of Morgan. I promise, no cliff hangers!

Morgan: Talk about drama queens! Not my fault!

31 thoughts on “Sassy cats — Morgan the perfect cat, Part 2

  1. Loved this one – funny writing! Jake well-endowed? Too funny! I cannot imagine pilling that many cats – you deserve a medal for bravery. I could never pill our cats (coward? me?) and Husband or the vet would have to do it.

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    • Right now only Hazel is hard to pill…sometimes. I am fortunate that she will take pill pockets (and can eat a meal with just pill pockets!). If the pill is very bitter, she will eat the pill pocket and spit out the pill. She has the most meds. She is now on prednisolone for her gut, glucosamine for her arthritis, an anti-diarrheal and a probiotic. Some are crushed, some pockets. For a while I was giving her a gel and she hated that. I have to get it in her mouth. She will fling it off her paw. All good though. Right now she is good.

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  2. That last photo of Morgan is just hysterical. Some advertising agency would love that pic! I can’t even imagine trying to medicate all the different “personalities” and you had me laughing at the ability to eat the pill pocket and leave the pill! Smart cats are the toughest, I’m thinking! Will be waiting for the next installment of “Morgan, the Perfect Cat!”

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  3. It’s sounds traumatic, but I know it was all worth it at the end to have your wonderful Morgan. I had to pill a friend’s persnickety cat while she was on vacation. I put on my old, thick, leather, letter jacket, one big glove (the other hand had to remain dexterous to operate the pill thingy), and grabbed a towel in which to wrap the poor thing. He seemed perfectly fine afterwards. It was me who had nightmares!

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