My mother and I never looked alike. We had different coloring and different shapes. We didn’t wear the same shoe size. Our tastes were different. We were different (or so I thought).
For the last 35 years of her life, I cut my mother’s hair — partly for convenience and partly for economy.
It also allowed her to yell at the person who could not make her look like her favorite movie stars. (Turns out that’s a family trait.)
Her hair was dark, thick and wavy. She didn’t wear bangs but had a deep wave to the side. She always wore it short. Not Miley Cyrus weird short but like a wavy Jennifer Lawrence from a few years back with a Veronica Lake wave to the side.
I have been growing out my hair for a while, especially my bangs. I don’t know why it takes so long. When I wore bangs, I trimmed them every 2 or 3 weeks.
Finally in December, my bangs were “grown out” but there was a problem. Over the years my forehead didn’t age as well as the rest of me (or someone swapped my forehead out for that of a 90-year-old woman — no, make that 110-year-old). It’s scary what hides under there.
I will need to wear bangs the rest of my life. It’s not the end of the world. Some people take cholesterol meds, I wear bangs. They had to be cut.
When going shorter it’s always best to go in steps. You can get used to the look. If it’s a mistake, it’s not hard to grow back.
After the first trim which gave me long center bangs that swung to the side I had a shock when I looked into the mirror.
For the first time ever, I looked like my mother. My hair was still much longer than she wore it and a different color but there was something about the way my bangs waved over my eyebrows that reminded me of her.
We have a lot in common. She took in strays and I’ve inherited that trait. Now I also have this big freaking wave on my wrinkly forehead.
And I like to complain about my hair just like she always did. It’s hard to find a stylist that can make me look like Meg Ryan. Maybe just another snip will do it.
I love that picture of Meg Ryan, but it helps to have a Glam Squad wherever you go to make yourself look perfect. Enjoy who you are. Its a hard lesson I’m still learning.
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I don’t think I’ll ever learn that lesson!
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When I pass a mirror, sometimes I wonder when I turned into my mother! Not the hair part though. Last month I had 4 inches cut off my hair and my bangs cut again after trying to grow them out. I never wore bangs as a young child or teenager. I believe I was in my 40’s when I took the plunge. Does that say something about my forehead? ~Elle
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Well…maybe. Bangs sure soften the face!
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My mom always complained about her haircuts. “I told her to make it shorter here and longer there,” she’d say. “That woman never listens to me. It makes me so mad.” She had perms until the day she died. She even gave me a Toni home perm when I was about seven years old.
A good hairstyle does improve a person’s looks, but it’s not easy to achieve, and it takes a lot of work. When I was in high school I slept on curlers and back-combed my hair. Now my simplified hair style looks about the same as it did when I was two years old.
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It’s a cycle, isn’t it? Eventually we all revert to Depends too. My mother occasionally did perms. It was the thing. She really didn’t need to but all her friends had fuzzy hair so…..And yes I remember sleeping on curlers and I’m not doing that again!
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At least the cats don’t care about your forehead ;). Mine has gotten way worse. But then everything has. It’s appalling. I love that your mom took in strays, too!
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We have an animal gene that runs in my family. Most of us have pets. It runs in my husband’s family too. He has 13 grandpets and 2 grandkids.
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That is so cool that the whole family participates in it. Hubby and my kids love animals (esp cats haha), too. My son is very animal rights conscious, like his mom, too. But it sure didn’t come from my parents. Maybe from my mother-in-law . . . .
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I think I have that 110 year old forhead! And not enough hair to wear bangs. So count your blessings my friend. And I’ll bet you look a whole lot like Meg too! 🙂
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Unfortunately not at all like her. 😦
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I recall one time when my Mum looked in the mirror and said “I look just like Gran” … and now I do the same. To skip a generation is even scarier!! She had bushy eyebrows though…
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I don’t remember my grandmother at all. I have two blurry pictures of her and in both she had her hair pulled back in a severe bun. Next to here my Mom looked so young although I could see they had the same shaped face. Other than that, I couldn’t see a resemblance. Some families have a remarkable resemblance between members. Our family not so much.
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LOL!! It’s so funny how we chase after a look. My mom had beautiful thick, wavy hair. My dad’s hair is thin and lifeless. I remember the day Mom said to me, “You have your Dad’s hair.” It stung at the time but I laugh about it now. Bless her heart.
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We inherit things we don’t want yet there are also wonderful things that we did inherit and take for granted!
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You are so right, Kate!
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🙂
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For me it is all the freckles on my arms. They look just like my mom’s arms.
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I never thought of comparing arms.
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My hair is nothing like my mother’s short, straight, brown hair. I got curls and frizz and blonde. It’s taken me years to realize that I need to go with what works. In fact, I’m working on that very Meg Ryan hairstyle right now.
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You go girl! That’s a gorgeous style! Wish I could wear it.
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My mother dyed her hair blonde. I hated it. I was never, ever, ever, going to dye my hair. Until I got my first grey hair at 16. By 25, people guessed I was 30. So I dyed my hair a deep red. Then brown. But now, guess which color mixes best with the grey?
Blonde, of course.
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When I was in my 20s I was good friends with a very attractive woman. Her worst feature was her hair which was dark brown but very thin and frizzy. The rest of her and her personality made her very attractive. We lost touch then re-met about 20 years ago. I was stunned because she was a blonde and at her roots was a slight growth of gray hair. She had gone totally gray and you’re right. Blonde hair disguises it much better. My mother colored her hair but stuck to her natural color (despite my urges to try other things). So do you look like your mother now?
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Apparently I look more like my grandmother in the face, but my build is very similar to my mother’s.
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Genetics are fascinating. I’m built like my father’s side of the family.
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Do you also cut the hair of all those strays you take in?
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only if necessary….
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Every once in awhile when I look in the mirror, I see my mother too. It can be startling, but I also sort of like it since I miss her so much. It’s when I look down at my arms and see her much-older arms (they can’t be mine, right?) that I am shocked. I’m with the others re Meg Ryan… lovely hair, scary face. It’s sad that she felt that something had to be done to it.
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I guess no one likes aging. Being an entertainer, it must be harder to age, especially if you can’t transition to non-ingénue roles. I too miss my mother a lot and it’s been a long time. Every once in a while I’ll come out with one of her sayings and I’m stunned.
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Kate, I know exactly how you feel. I’ve had the darnedest time finding a barber who could cut my hair so that I look like George Clooney. For some reason, I always come out looking like Steve Buscemi. I’d wear bangs but everyone tells me you have to have hair first. I guess I need to go find a shampoo that will give me more volume. Or like other guys with thin hair, try growing it on my face. 😀
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I’d give up on George Clooney. Perhaps a rug and oh yes, that red nose doesn’t help.
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I’ve been wanting to de-emphasize my nose, but nothing has worked. And I refuse to wear a rug on principle. Aside from the fact that wearing a carpet is quite cumbersome, I just feel I should wait until another Indian rug store goes out of business to get a good deal.
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I’ve always been a fan of Meg Ryan . . . but these days her hair is her best feature. All the work she had done on her face makes her look like the Joker from Batman.
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I haven’t seen her lately. I did see Raquel Welch on a talk show and was stunned at how stiff her face was. She looked younger as long as she didn’t try to talk.
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I couldn’t believe how weird John Travolta looked on the Late Show last night. He got rid of his wrinkles, but ended up looking abnormal.
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I saw him recently too and his face was so bloated. I don’t know what causes that. Maybe it pulls out the wrinkles. I also saw Josh Brolin and his face was so big too but he had to put on 40 lbs for a movie role. He’s working on dropping it.
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I had major deja vu reading this post, Kate. Have you posted your mother’s photo before? As for Meg’s hair…love it! The cosmetic surgery she had later…not so much.
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Jill ~ while you were posting your comment. I was posting mine. I see our thoughts on the work Meg had done mesh well.
But her hair still looks grand.
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Lol!
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I love have always loved hair that curls. I have waves but they don’t hold as well as a curly pattern does.
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My mom’s hair is blonde and straight and mine is curly (code for frizzy) and red, she has blue eyes and I have hazel (code for brown) and I never thought we looked at all alike. But when I put a blonde wig on I suddenly looked exactly like her. I can’t unsee that! My mom is beautiful but you know…she’s my mom.
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I know exactly what you mean. I suspect that if I put on a brunette wig all of her features that I have would come out.
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My hair idol is when Nicole Kidman had long curly copper red hair. (maybe late 80s/early 90s) I have desperately straight, fine, thin, mousy brown hair.
If I were given 3 wishes, I might waste one on that hair.
Sigh.
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Three wishes…hmm….that’s an interesting thought. It should be world peace, end to animal cruelty and food for everyone but more height (I’m shortish) and better hair are tempting.
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Aren’t those narcissistic wishes so tempting? People are hungry, abused, dying of terrible diseases, the earth is being ruined …. But curly red hair. 😀
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You are my kind a girl!
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