Well Merry Christmas! – Our very first holiday card was the notification of the death of a classmate of the beloved husband. Not a good omen. Technically it wasn’t a holiday card but a notecard. It would be hard to put that news in a card with a happy Santa on the cover.
Weird fetishes – My young cat Morgan loves to lie on the computer desk when I’m working there. Occasionally she will be bored and noses around to see what she can play with. Her favorite are envelopes. She loves licking the glue. I stop her when I catch her because it doesn’t seem like a good idea (and yes I saw the Seinfeld episode where George Costanza’s fiancé died of licking invitation envelopes!).
Oblivious – I hate gassing up my car. More so in the winter when your hands get cold and smelly. This past week I took advantage of a warm day and was pretty pleased with myself. The next day I looked out my side view mirror and noticed that I had forgotten to close my gas cap. Fortunately I hadn’t driven too much with it hanging out. I better put my name in for a spot at the home for crazy old people, or better still — crazy old flamboyant people with pets.
It’s the time of the year – I love the email subject lines these days. I got one from DSW (the big shoe company) that said, “Did you forget you need boots?” I don’t need boots, really I don’t.
Down for the count – This week I was really sick. (I’m better now!) I was sicker than I had been in a while. How do I know? Besides wanting to go directly to the undertaker I slept with parsley on my teeth. How disgusting is that? I felt badly for the parsley!
So how was your week?
Kate even when you are sick the jokes keep coming, I admire that skill and wish I had it. Hope you are on the mend and ready for the festive madness.
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I’m never ready for festive madness. Just waiting for spring.
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I’m sorry you were sick, Kate. I had a nasty flu in November and then this past week had a really bad cold! I’m not usually sick at all, so twice in two months seems out of place. I am fine now, and I sure hope you are, too. It’s odd about Morgan and the envelope glue, and personally, I never lick an envelope that I don’t think of that Seinfeld episode. Take care..you want to be well for Christmas. 🙂
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I haven’t licked an envelope in years. These days a lot of envelopes are self-sticking but if they aren’t that’s what scotch tape is for! So sorry you were sick. Haven’t had anything respiratory. Most of my issues are GI related.
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Sorry you weren’t feeling well. I never appreciate how healthy I am..for the most part…until I get sick enough to stay in bed. Unfortunately, since October I have had three sick in bed weeks…not consecutive weeks…but still a bummer.
Morgan is just showing you love when she is joining you at the computer.
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Oh my! 3 weeks is a lot. I agree with you about not appreciating health. This past year every once in a while I announce to my husband how lucky we are that we are healthy. (Then I lapse back into taking it for granted.)
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So glad you are feeling better! Starbucks was probably about to send you a get well card. (Did the cats sit on you and glare? Like “Why are you wasting time lying here and smelling weird?” Cats are so considerate.
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I didn’t get the SB card yet but I still have hope. Mail is slow. The cats clustered around discussing how they would get fed if I died. Something about opposable thumbs. Gotta love ’em!
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Yes, I would have to go with that not being a greeting card. Sounds like Morgan likes to get here licks in. I’ve done the gas cap thing too. Kate, I bet now you really don’t feel like your in good company. that’s giving DSW the boot! You might have gotten sick of parsley too.
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Great collection of one liners!
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Sorry you weren’t feeling well, and do hope you’re feeling better today. You know, of course, you can’t die. The cats need to be fed. EVERY DAY. 🙂
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Every. Single. Day. Oh wait. Twice. Every. Single. Day. With a little snack somewhere too.
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They would not be happy cats if the lunch lady didn’t show up. 😦
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Seriously!
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I hate pumping gas, right after emptying the dishwasher and taking out the garbage. Glad you’re feeling better, Kate. Looks like Morgan kept you company. DSW thinks I need boots, too.
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I wore more boots when I was younger. Now they are mostly annoying except for serious snow boots and I don’t need those either.
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So glad you are feeling better! Keep connecting to what is alive and loving 🙂
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Thanks!
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We all get wrapped up in the holiday season that sometimes we forget there are those suffer loss or sickness.
One of the perks of living in NJ is not having to pump your own gas in the winter. ..:)
Parsley? Really? Never heard of that…what is it good for?
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It wasn’t intentional. I was sick and went to bed. The next morning I realized I hadn’t brushed (and I never forget!). I lived in NJ for a while and loved that. It was cheaper too. PA is expensive for gas.
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Lol…sorry, I thought it was some kind of remedy.
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I’m happy you’re feeling better, Kate. Being sick is the pits. How about those Eagles? Yay! Again, the game wasn’t televised here, but I caught some of it on the computer. Have a great week.
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It wasn’t a noisy game in our house. My husband said the Bills lost rather than the Eagles won but we’ll take it anyway!
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I’m glad you are feeling better! I got a flu shot early this year so I hope I avoid the cruds. Too many opportunities to be around lots of people who don’t have the sense to stay home if they are sick. I’ll be doing elbow bumps rather than hugs and hand shakes.
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It wasn’t respiratory. It was an IBS flare-up. There are no shots for that! (I wish!) I prefer bumps myself. You never know where people had their hands!
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It’s funny you should mention emails…just got one asking if I’d like my very own Santa for Xmas. It came with an 800 number.
Death in a note is a tad better than leaving it on an answering machine, something I’ve experienced more than once. I think face to face is bad enough but then again, if it’s not feasible than a note is the only solution.
Morgan licks glue…I guess it’s better than sniffing it like in high school.
Glad you’re on the mend. 🙂
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Your very own Santa? And I wonder what exactly he would do for you? The death was someone from my husband’s college years. He hadn’t seen him in 20 or more years but they close back in the day. I though it was nice that his wife sent a note to his old friends. They don’t live near us so we wouldn’t have known otherwise. An answering machine would be weird especially if it’s someone who meant something to you.
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I’m glad it wasn’t anyone close. A private Santa does perk up one’s ears, doesn’t it.
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Yes indeed!
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Ho Ho …Ho
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🙂
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Our first Christmas card was from our lawn sprinkler maintenance company. I wonder what that bodes? You’re feeling better now? I bet it was the parsley that healed you! 🙂
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Yay parsley!
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My cats always have to be wherever I am. When I’m at the computer, one is on my lap and the other two at my feet, waiting for attention. And I wouldn’t want it any other way. Glad to hear you’re feeling better now!
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Yeah, cats are like that. Everyone’s napping now which means I can use the computer in peace…until 3 to 4 p.m. when all hell will break lose again.
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Parsley supposedly eliminates bad breath so at least you didn’t have to worry about that while sleeping!
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Let me say that it doesn’t. Even the cats wouldn’t come near until I got the damn parsley and other bad stuff out of my mouth. Industrial strength mouthwash!
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Glad you bounced back and got rid of that parsley stuck in your teeth!
We had a good week, including going to see Celtic Angels’ Christmas ~ delightful.
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Celtic Angels? I had to look that up and it does look wonderful!
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My week consisted of 1) shingles shot 2) dental check-up 3) visit to hygienist. NOT fun!!! But there’s no snow yet, so it’s all good!
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No snow in Canada! I thought it was just us having a super mild December. I hate those “doctor” weeks but it’s good to get it all done at once. Now it’s time to party!
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Hope you are well recovered in time to enjoy the holidays.
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Me too. We have an event on Wednesday.
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Those dang glue lickers. Glad you are feeling better 🙂
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I know! Almost wanted to taste the envelopes to see what was so fascinating. Then I remember the Seinfeld episode.
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I’ve always liked the taste of envelopes, so I don’t blame your cat haha. I’ve never seen the Seinfeld episode. Apparently I need to watch it for my own safety lol
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Yes it will swear you off of licking just about anything (except ice cream).
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Glad you are feeling better! Parsley? I am embarrassed to say that since CH retired in 2007, I have not filled up the tank on either of our vehicles… not once. Well, maybe twice. We don’t want Morgan to get a paper cut on her tongue!
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You are so lucky! I hate all things car — washing, gassing and even driving. I’ll discuss the hazards of envelope licking with Morgan although she never listens.
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The way you talk about your cats..well I am almost tempted to get one. But..I can’t stand the litter box..and the hair..(I have had two beore..one went out and never came home…the other was my son’s..and I looked after it for three months..Patches is in cat heaven now) so I think I will keep looking for a little dog to sit beside me on the sofa..
Merry Christmas Kate ..and give your beloved husband a big hug and a kiss.. ❤
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Oh…I had a Patches too. She never made it to cathood. She got out and was hit by a tractor trailer when she was about 4 months old. And this is why my cats never go out anymore. I was 12 and heartbroken. There are dogs that don’t shed much. Cats are harder to predict. My shorthair sheds more than my longhair.
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Glad you’re feeling better and snarky!
Those emails kill me…tempt me…and remind me that yes, yes indeed I do need boots.
Dogs and cats are not very different. Peanut does that to me anytime I’m on the computer. He prefers to lick my feet rather than glue. Lesser of 2 evils? Not sure.
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I’m in the office now. Morgan is on my husband’s chair and Hazel is on the hassock (doesn’t anyone call them that anymore?) All will be good until my husband comes in and moves Morgan. First she will rub herself on my touch screen which does all kinds of weird things. Then she will settle down and chew something. If I’m lucky, it’s not a bill.
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I love all of their weird ways … so funny!
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Ha, my cats try and sleep on the actual laptop, not the desk. Or at least that’s my excuse when I am late with a post.
Sorry about your illness. 😦 Supposedly if you take zinc and get some light exercise when you first feel the onset of a cold, it will lessen the severity and duration. Not sure if it works for the flu, though!
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Oh it wasn’t a cold. It had something to do with too much wine. I don’t drink wine because something in it gives me bad headaches. A friend made some and that nightmare was even worse. Not sure what was in it and I didn’t drink that much. No one sleeps ON my keyboard (I don’t use a laptop) but Morgan does like to rub the touch screen. Everything goes wonky then.
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Oh no, sorry to hear your felt so awful. I hope you are really feeling better. Need soup? And if it is any consolation, almost everyone I know is sick!!!!
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Great! Holidays are always the worst time to get sick.
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