Jake: Resting, my eyeball! I think she’s eating that chocolate covered coconut Easter egg that she’s been hoarding all weekend!
Hazel: Our visitor seemed ok but she sure smelled like dog. I crawled into her luggage to put a nice cat scent on it but I am not sure I covered the dog completely up. I probably should have peed in it. That usually works.
Mollie: The best thing about her was that she didn’t put the lid down on the people litter box. Every time I tried to sneak in though, Kate was there plopping it down so I didn’t get any chance to crawl in and check it out.
Hazel: Yes and extra belly rubs!
Mollie: Did you hear the story about the dog that ate the wallpaper off the kitchen walls? I think it was the retriever across the street.
Hazel: That wouldn’t be allowed in this house. I don’t like wallpaper anyway. I much prefer to hide socks and mousies.
Mollie: Yeah, dogs are so needy. Who wants to get slobbered on anyway? And you know where they like to stick their nose! That is so disgusting. That reminds me, did you smell Jake’s butt?
Hazel: Oh man, don’t make me do that again. I swear he never cleans the thing.
Mollie: OK. But there are a lot of black cats that look just like him.
Hazel: Yes but they don’t look quite that dopey.
Jake: Excuse me! I have a sophisticated charm about me. Just ask Kate. I brought her a dead mouse on Friday. I was trying to impress the new chick. Not sure if it worked.
Mollie: Kate doesn’t like dead mice!
Jake: Yes, she does! She always plants them just like flowers. She wouldn’t do that if she didn’t like them.
Mollie: Let’s go see if we can make her feel guilty again. Maybe we can get more snacks or some catnip and a belly rub.
Hazel: Yeah! Belly rub!
Jake: We are signing out to reap the rewards of guilt! Long live guilt!